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Not from you...
by Irina Guschina (Age: 53)
copyright 07-09-2003


Age Rating: 16 to 127

 
Not from you, but from the pine's whisper
I am leaving on a night lane.
Too amazed by this fate blooper,
I was trying to cheat my pain.

Not having even the words to say,
Or the hot tears to have a good cry
And to whisper a heart-breaking Good-bye…
Not from you, I am going away.




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Comments on this Article/Poem:
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09-20-2004 Aaron Schmookler    

Irina,

As always, you come up with some evokative phrases that really touch my heart... "from a pine's whisper"... "leaving on a night lane".

Aaron
07-11-2003 Christopher Doss    

Sometimes leaving takes a lot of courage.
Very nice write Irina
07-10-2003 Nancy Pawley    

Irina, sometimes it takes going away to find what is really needed..wonderful write.
Nancy
07-09-2003 Moses Hochstetler    

Very good, Irena, I love that original line: "not from you, I am going away."
07-09-2003 Janet Owenby    

Just excellent Irina love the hot tears nice touch. A perfect score from me.
07-09-2003 Gregory Christiano    

Irina: once again, you've done a terrific job in expression and emotional flair. Nice.
Gregory
07-09-2003 Lyle Berry    

Dear Irina:

This is beautiful and like all of your poems, the economy of words still results in massive and wonderous expression. A few grammatical suggestions are added in parentheses below:

Not from you, but from (the) pine's whisper(s)
I am (leaving)(on) a lane.
Too amazed by this fate blooper,
I was trying to cheat my pain.

Not having even the word(s) to say,
(Or) even (the)tiny tear(s) to have (a)good cry
and to whisper a heart-breaking Good-bye…
Not from you(,) I am going away.

Warm Regards,
Lyle
Visitor Reads: 596
Total Reads: 663
Comments: 7

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