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In the beginning,there was nothing to suggest the existence;no movement,no feeling of the tiny new life. Then began the 'off' mornings,the idea there was something not quite 'right'.
When the verification came,there were more signs. Tenderness,swelling,soon the telltale bulge. Reality soon set in with the first sign of life;the smallest shift in position. Then came the frequent kicks and somersaults, indigestion and,slightly embarrassing,the incontinence.
Finally, there was no denying the inevitable. Minor discomfort gave way to a lower backache,which gave way to intense muscle contractions and almost unbearable pain. Hours of breathing and walking and squeezing and sweating and wanting to just give up and give in and swearing and crying.
At last the moment arrives...push, breathe, push, breathe, push...PUSH! Reaching down to 'catch' the tiny,fragile new life as it emerges into the world. Staring with wide-eyed wonder and fear and apprehension and love. Oh lots and lots of love,a love more intense, more incredible than ever known before...
As I stare into the big, beautiful eyes of my newborn child in amazement and awe, look upon the most perfect of all God's creations, this sweet inoccent babe which stirs the most incredulous feelings of protectiveness for this helpless, dependant little being. All of the emotions that hit you at once as you realize YOU did this,she is YOUR responsibility,her life and general well being are in your hands.
You kiss her soft cheeks,hug and cuddle and snuggle her to you,smell that wonderful, delicious, intoxicating baby smell and smile and think I love you, my sweet and beautiful little angel.
(I wrote this several months after the birth of my first child,which I would've sworn i wasn't going to survive at the time. More proof of what women can endure...30 hours and no drugs! Anyway, I know it's rough and i was going to 'FIX' it, but it was meant to be exactly as it is.)
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