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6 Writers

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Street Angel
by Debra Rose (Age: 21)
copyright 11-21-2003


Age Rating: 16 to 127

 
She was an angel of the night,
A street girl, large lips, voluptuous hips,
With a cut up camosile and tear smudged mascarra,
Brows plucked too thin,
Skirt a bit too high,
About as high as she was on average,
Lips wrapped around a roach or some other profanities,
Illegal possessions and sexual weapons.
She was put there to cleanse the men and their sins,
Taking the evil inside of her each night,
Killing their seed with god sent pills of green,
Small enough but weapons of mass murder,
Destroying the babies growing in her daily.
She drank a bit too much,
Was known by name with the local PD and drug dealers,
Had a few customers of the men in blue,
And the men covered in white powedered cocaine,
Had twelve kids that she never remembered,
Because she was too stoned to remember anything.
A queen of sex by trade and legs a bit too thick,
Beautiful by all means except the usual,
With a personality that had died.
I wanted to miss her, to forget her and never remember,
The way she looked with hair all afray,
A mutt in mangy clothing drooling on the lap of men,
Leaking saliva to their legs.
But each night stumbling home with her door wide open,
Everyone asleep and the smell permeating,
Sex and weed,
I refused to believe,
She was my sister.


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Comments on this Article/Poem:
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06-04-2005 Jean George    

There are some spelling errors, but aside from that, this is a portrait in poetry that is hard hitting, gritty and stunningly tragic in so many ways. You have the gift of writing an image that profoundly shocks as it also paints such an explicit picture that it explodes in the mind and leaves the reader in awe of your talent.
06-03-2005 Leah Garrison    

I would hate to say anything to dampen the well-deserved praise of previous posters - because I highly favor this poem as well - but you have some spelling errors that rather ruin the mood.
line 3 - is that supposed to be "camisole"?
line 3 - "mascara"
line 17 - "powdered"

I absolutely love the slant rhyme you used the the second and third to last lines. it's perfect.

=^.^=
04-15-2004 Andrea Jeanette DiGiantomasso    

My word... this is amazing. I give my fullest endorsement-- the images were powerful and the title drew me in and you made this tension and conflict and this ending that made me whistle in astonishment... this is one of the best poems i've ever read. congratualations. tell me when you publish ^_~
11-26-2003 Janet Owenby    

Debra, I gave this poem highest ratings because the content is so powerful from the first line to the last line. Someday girl your going high places with your writing. Remember me, when you become famous.
11-23-2003 Moses Hochstetler    

Powerful testimonial for the new millennium. Great write. Will be watching for more from you.

Best wishes,
Hoosier Poet Moses L.
11-21-2003 Gregory Christiano    

Phew! Left me breathless! Thrilling, emotionally charged and quite a surprise ending. All around a terrific poem, powerful in imagery and message! Nicely done Debra...
11-21-2003 Toni Sweeney    

Great poem.
Toni S.
Visitor Reads: 511
Total Reads: 560
Comments: 7

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