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Robert Betts
Sofia Martins
Stephanie Quee
3 Writers

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3 Members
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Flower Child
by Stefanie Mendoza (Age: 21)
copyright 03-18-2004


Age Rating: 7 to 127

 
Ripened emotions
Blossom throughout golden years
Fresh for the picking

**AN**- Again Walt gets the prize for another one of my works named! WHat would I do without ya Walt?? Thanks for the help!!

~Steffie~




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03-18-2005 Anthony Lane Stahlhut    

This is rather good accually. Thanks, anthony
09-24-2004 Len Mcintosh    

Say, you are a little tough on yourself, suggesting that you can't write haiku. This is good stuff - I mean, what do you want?
I bought a book of Jack Kerouac's haiku poems a few months back and the biggest difference that I can see between yours and his is that his has a famous writer's name attached. [not implying that your name is less than famous, Steffie] :o)
The bottom line is that it's pretty-good stuff. Keep at it! It will get even better.
Len McIntosh
P.S. If you're not familiar with Jack Kerouac, punch him into Google. [Can you imagine someone someone from a hundred years ago returning and reading this last sentence?] LOL
05-17-2004 Andrea Jeanette DiGiantomasso    

I know I can't do titles either-- but neither could dickensen, my hero! ^_^ very cool. i give you a four cuz it's cute and clever.
04-13-2004 Aaron Schmookler    




04-13-2004 Aaron Schmookler    

Stefanie,

A nice haiku, and with some work a real touching one. Where I find I have trouble with it is in the tense switching. Ripened - blossom - Fresh. I somehow can't quite follow the chronology here - though I somehow sense that there is one. Have they ripened? Do they ripen then blossom? At which stage does the picking happen?

I like the space between the ideas in this poem. AS haiku aught, it leaves the reader witha little work to do in fleshing out the message.
04-03-2004 Rissa T.    

Good Haiku! I like it! ^-^
04-02-2004 Jenny Stein    

haikus.
something i never did.
but oyu do well.
03-22-2004 Pepper Basham    

Great work, Stefanie. Wonderful Haiku!
03-22-2004 Toni Sweeney    

Great job on the Haiku. Keep up the awesome work.
Toni S.
03-20-2004 Lyle Berry    

A perfect modern Haiku. Loved it!

Warm Regards,
Lyle
Visitor Reads: 654
Total Reads: 737
Comments: 10

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