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Gosh! Have I been there, did that and have pictures! This is a nice way to say...SO LONG SUCKER! I'm moving on to bigger and better things! Thanks, Anthony
Hi Cortney,
This is a bold statement, the reader feels the anguish. I have a few suggestions for you:
The third stanza jumps around a bit;
"I know what I did,
But I would have made it right.
If you'd give me time,
I would have proven to make myself right."
You use "right" twice as the end rhyme, and the last sentence is poorly constructed. Here's an idea for you, and I'll try to keep close to your words:
"I know what I did,
But would have made it right.
If you'd give me some time,
See me in honest light."
Also a typo...fro--> for
All in all a good piece, just needs some polish.
Welcome !
