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it was just a normal day
by Paula T. (Age: 15)
copyright 07-29-2004


Age Rating: 7 to 127

  it was just a normal day
Picture Credits:

It was just a normal day. Well, as normal as graduating from college can get. At least it was until Lucky came along. Me and Ricky were in the BMW that I got for graduating college, listening to Britney Spears wail her newest hit as loud as she can. We were all psyched because we were finally finished with school. Well I was, anyway. Ricky had
Gotten a scholarship to Harvard Law school. I wasn’t the least surprised. He had the highest SATS in the district. Ricky was the nerd. I only went to college for the prize at the end. This bright red BMW. But I really didn’t think it was worth it. Maybe a Porsche
But not a BMW. BMWs were so last month. Now Porsches were all the rage.
“Turn Britney, up Bob, she’s all the rage!” Ricky stated.
As if! Britney was as last month as Hilary Duff’s “So Yesterday” song and BMWs. But I made the volume higher. What I do for my friends. Suddenly Ricky pushed the brakes as hard as he could, making me look up from my magazine. I followed his gaze and saw a young woman standing there, looking at us all confused. Ricky jumped up from the car and rushed up to her. They started talking and making fluid motions. Finally Ricky went into the car and the young woman trailed after
him, looking very confused. Se sat down in the back seat of the car. Ricky made the introductions.
“Lucky, this is Bob Ackerman, Bob this is Lucky Anderson. She was headed to the college, too so I volunteered to drive her there, after all, the more the merrier!”
Ricky nervously chuckled. He never was good at making friends. 10 blocks later we stood in front of the Community College. Lucky held a piece of paper in her hand, and she kept looking at it, making sure that it was there. We all got out of the car.
“So,” I said looking at her. “I guess this is it.”
“I guess it is.” she said quietly, speaking for the first time today.
She had a very pretty voice, I noticed, looking her over. She was very white,
as white as a sheet, I observed. Her cheeks were a rosy red, the only color on her pretty face. She wasn’t wearing any make-up, but even so , she was real pretty, prettier than the other girls in our college. Her lips were pale pink. Her blond hair was so light that it was
almost white. It was in 2 braids that reached the back of her knees. She was wearing a graduation gown, but hers was paler than mine & Ricky’s. She noticed me looking over her & smiled faintly.


We were sitting in alphabetical order. Mandy Ackulmer was sitting next to me & Lucky
was supposed to be behind her. She wasn’t there. The guy in charge called up our names
to get our diplomas then get our picture taken. Mandy went, but then a boy called Mario
Apinto came up. Nobody called Lucky Anderson.


Rickyand I went back into the car. We discovered that Lucky left her paper. We saw that it contained her address.


15 minutes later me and Ricky parked the car to a cozy little house. We rang the doorbell.
A frazzled women came to the door.
“ I don’t want to buy anything ” she said, closing the door.
I inserted my foot into the door.
“Madam, are you Lucky’s guardian? I asked. I always was a get-to-the-point type of person.
The woman looked at me as tears cascaded her worn cheeks.
“Why, yes I am .” taking a handkerchief out of the pocket of her apron she wiped her tears. “Sorry I was rude boys. Come in and I will tell you the whole story.”
She ushered us into a yellow room with pictures in frames all over the walls. It was filled with comfortable-looking furniture, a Panasonic Television, a table covered with pens and papers and other accessories you find in most people’s homes.
Ricky and I sat on plush chairs while Mrs.Anderson sat on the couch. Her husband came into the room and sat next to her.
“Pardon me for that, you see our dear Lucky died 10 years ago on this same day.”
I felt the color drain from my face looked over at Rick and saw that the same had happenedto him.
“But that’s impossible!” he sputtered
“I beg your pardon?” Mr.Anderson asked
Ricky was hyperventilating so I answered for him.
“Sir, we came here because of her. You see, we were going to the college graduation, she crossed the road in front of the car and we almost hit her but then she told us that she was headed to the College, where we happened to be going, so we offered her a ride.
She left this in the car.”
I handed the paper to Mrs.Anderson.
As she looked at it her eyes filled with tears once again. She passed it to Mr.Anderson, and his eyes filled with tears immediately. He put the paper aside.
Mrs.Anderson looked at us. Then she stood up and gave us each a big hug.
“You see, on this day, 10 years ago, Lucky walked to the College for her graduation ceremony. She was walking across the street when her fellow classmate, who was drunk from partying rammed into her. The doctors did all they could but she was too weak .
She was alive for 2 minutes on the operating table, where she was in a coma for 2 hours, but the medicine they tried on her was too much & she passed out, they revived her, but she was in too much pain, so they left her alone.
“But she was in our car today!” Ricky protested, who had just come out of his hyperventilating state.
Mrs.Anderson answered us. “You see, when ghosts have unfinished business they are given a limited time to finish that business without meeting anybody they know. They have to deliver that object or message or whatever it is through perfect strangers. That is what the man in the hospital who treats people whose loved ones died said. Once that is delivered the ghost can live in peace. Thank-you for freeing our daughter! If there is anything that can be done, please let us know!”
“Nothing can be done,” Rick and I assured Mrs.Anderson. When we were out of the house Rick fainted. I caught him. We were both exhausted. But we had accomplished a lot today.


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Comments on this Article/Poem:
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05-30-2005 Jane L.    

Cool story.


08-09-2004 Emily Garwood    

I love a story with a ghost needing to rest in peace reminds me of this story i got in an email once about this woman called rose who had never been to college or something and she was really old but went to college and she made friends with all the eople and told stories and was really popular and she was asked to give a speech for graduation...a couple days after graduation she died peacefully in her bed, now that she felt she had completed her life!
You wrote a good story and your grammer is really good too, well done!


07-28-2004 Regina S.    

This was an awesome story! I love the 'miracles can happen' theme! :D Just one thing, You see at the bottom of it, there are 3 ppls names, 'Charlie' 'Jane' and 'mary' click on charlie! ^-~


07-27-2004 Sam Hackel-Butt    

Oh as soon as I hear "Britney Spears" and "Lucky" I thought of her song. Was this intentional? lol.

Other than that, well done! I see you like writing about past events, or telling a story within a story. And you do it so well! Whenever I write like that, it's so long and boring even I fall asleep proofreading it.

Maybe try separating your paragraphs with a blank line, so it's easier to follow, so if you happen to glance away from the screen, you can find your place easier :)

Keep writing!

-Sammy


07-26-2004 Victoria Medley    

This is a very good storyline, and you did a very good job of keeping spelling and grammar error to a minimum. (Though you need to read through it again. You're writing this story in past tense, but a few times you say things like "can" istead of "could" {in the first line}). The flow isn't very good though. You should look into trying to use different kinds of sentences, not just complicated or simple ones in a row. Switch it up.


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