Dreams Flowing
by
Crystal (bunny) Johnson
(Age: 18)
copyright 05-20-2005
Age Rating: 13 to 127
Dreams flowing in and out of her head,
wishing she could be dead.
No turning back,
the walls will soon crack.
There she will lay,
all white and gray.
Not trying to be brave,
alone in her grave.
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Yeah I'd have to agree with Andrew, this poem makes death seem peacefull, and it has a different consept than most poems. I'd have to say it's very dark, but it's very good in the sense of the rythm and flow. Great job!
This poem makes death seem so peaceful. I don't think of death as something to be feared. Of course, under normal circumstances I would never chose to kill myself, and I'm glad you wrote a note saying that you love life and would never kill yourself either. Life is always full of surprises. I just want to see what will happen next...
I liked this poem...Death fantasies are very common in your age group...Very romantic death fantasies of course. I did it myself at your age."They'll miss when I'm gone" was my favorite theme. I recently wrote a poem on the same subject, but it was a fantasy gone wrong...Any way, you have a really nice writing style...keep it up.
please don't take it like that. i have a talent at writting at different points of views. i would never kill myself. i have to much to live for and as each day goes by, i look to the future and know Bade and the rest of my family will meet me there. so killing my self is a no no in all my problems. i just look on the bright side. also notice that i wrote this poem as if i were reading the girl's mind as she was thinking it and at the same time i was seeing it happening. re-read it. this time read it as if i was saying it about a depressed girl sitting at a table all alone. thanks mia
No, this is a bad idea. Your poem is good, but there is no need to die and I wish you would not even think about it! Life seems cruel when you are young and still learning.( we always are learning ) You might think it's bad, but it will get better if you keep trying! Keep your chin up, Anthony
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