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Insomnia
by Heather Jackson (Age: 30)
copyright 06-01-2005


Age Rating: 13 to 127

 
She rose in the deep, dark hours of the night, when most around her slept. She wanted to rejoin them, go back to sleep, forget the world around her in the sweet restorative release of slumber, but found that difficult at the moment. She’d first woken just an hour before, and had laid in bed for most of the hour, tossing and turning, trying to go back to sleep. Alas, the kinks in her body kept her from finding that comfortable position to fall asleep in, and her mind was far too active for rest.

Her hand fumbled on the dresser for discarded glasses, and she carefully made her way through the darkened house to the living room, where she could turn on the light and give voice to the mind that kept her up. Once she got the light on, she caught motion out of the corner of her eye; the cats looked up at her, disturbed from their sleep. After a minute, they shifted their long bodies and settled back in to sleep. She imagined they’d make up for the interrupted sleep sometime during the day, but she’d never know when; they were cats, after all, and these were particularly lazy.

She sat down at the computer, connecting to a small world of others who were, like her, awake at this hour. She hoped she’d get tired again soon, maybe be able to go back to bed. Of course, if experience had taught her anything, it was that when she got back to bed, she’d have to reclaim her place. Her husband tended to roll into the warm spots her body left when she got up. In the winter, that was nice; she came back to a bed as warm as the one she left. Now that the summer fast approached, and with it, the high heat of the southern plains, a warm bed was less desirable. Still, it was nice to climb into bed, snuggle up close to him, even if it was out of the necessity of getting him to roll over and give her room.

They’d been married 7 years now. She’d spent most of the first 5 or so years expecting their parents to show up at the door and take them both home. They’d make some comment about playing house or something. But 7 years and 8 days had passed now, and that knock had never come, and she was feeling far more adult and settled than she ever had before.

Adult. Now that was just funny. She felt like she’d grown up long before her time... and then she’d gone away to college and allowed herself the luxury of acting her age and getting goofy. She’d married young, though not as young as some. They’d really been growing up together in many ways, and while they had their share of flaws, each year that passed drew them closer together and on that inevitable and unenviable march to maturity. Oh, sure, they had their fair share of battle scars, too, from those early days, when they were still learning who they were individually, and what it meant to be married now, but scars only rise where healing has begun, and because of their commitment to each other, and to the promise of things to come, they’d been working through their battles. Today, she would make the headway, tomorrow it would be him. Most days, though, were settled into their safe routines. There was a peace in just being in his presence.

Even now, while he slept in the other room, she knew that if she turned out the lights and crept back into bed, he’d be there waiting for her. He might start to snore a little when she disturbed him, but he’d settle back into dream-sleep in no time. There was a comfort in that certainty. He’d get them up in the morning (she’d never been a morning person, and she thought she’d dread this morning particularly) get himself ready for work, and go off to his day in the city. That night, when he got home, they’d have a bite to tide them over and then head off to church. Afterwards, they’d go out with friends and have fun being with other people. But before they went to bed tonight, there would be time when they could just sit and be with the other person. And they’d snuggle tonight, like they did every night, his body curling around hers, holding her close.

Actually, the more she thought of it, the better it sounded. Since she’d be getting up in 2 hours anyway, she thought if she was going to get any more rest tonight, she might as well head back to bed now. If nothing else, she wanted to listen to him sleeping.


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06-18-2005 Brian Dickenson    

A truly delightful slice of life. Funny how we are all so alike. The human condition I suppose.
There are few feeling so blissful as snuggling in close to the one you love, especially on a cold winters night.
Than you for letting me in.
Brian.


06-01-2005 Anthony Lane Stahlhut    

It seems that as time passes, I find the things that were so important to me when I was younger have lost their place of importance. Now just being in the same room as my wife is as nice as going out somewhere. Love is wonderful and if you get the chance...you should fall into it! Thanks, Anthony


06-01-2005 Heather Jackson    

In case you were wondering...yes, this is rather auto-biographical. It's now almost 4 and I've been awake almost 2 hours now...
And since we'll be getting up shortly before 6, if I have any hope of getting any more rest before the alarm goes off, I should head to bed...


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