Falling

Droplets of hope. Fragments of unshed tears. Falling. Misery in its fullest form, a bare being hunched into itself from the hurt. Flogged skin, welts, and angry essence drip, drop, drop, drip from cracks in the barrier. A broken vase, full of fluid emotion, lacking reason to display proudly with a joyous laugh. Tipped over in a sudden flash shower of uncertainty, feelings that should never be but are in the mind of a young woman. Cowering whimpers, imaginary whips lash out, keeping her a prisoner of these fluid emotions, unblinking eyes and unwise mind, foolish to think. At all.

Quiet. They can’t torment your thoughts. No, despite the drip, drop, drop, drip pounding your being from existing, allowing more of you to die, more of me to escape to a world bound to destroy itself. Reality. Such an evil word, an even more evil existence. Such a powerful punishment to one who can’t stand reality nor delusions, where slowly, piece by piece, section by section, becomes today. Becomes yesterday. Becomes years ago. Becomes winter on the lake. Angrily replaying in the minds eye, bitterness of torn dreams.

Drowning voices, echoing shrieks of despair in hollow love. Desires for release. There is no monochromatism in a white and black space. Words of no meaning, yet full to the brim of empty au revoirs that you passed on so willingly. Unable to part. Not capable of letting go of this sensation that forms me. Shivers, tears, angry thrashing, and the unmistakable face of you. Another crack, another leak. Control is lost when you never even had it in your grasp in the first place. Deeper and deeper, depths of fantasized proportions. Shattered heart, and a shy smile. Another smack! Another tear. Another… mistake.

All is dark. Eyes closed, sun hiding, moon playing hide and seek amongst the silver wisps of clouds. Frail, yet handled so abruptly through the angry gale of laughter upon the air. Life goes on, amidst this sea of au revoirs and Adieus that last for oh so long. How fragile is the heart, to break so easily at the first signs of torn hope? With the barrier washed away amidst the salty brine, and the face of you still smiling behind closed eye lids, how will I ever escape this feeling of falling? In love again, with you?