Home of: Prose, Poetry & Contests
rss feed
 Prose-n-Poetry

Prose-n-Poetry.com

 Email Us [e-mail]
Enter our Poetry Contest and Win a Cash Prize !
Tell your friends! We Pay You to Comment!
Welcome !

Please Sign In
MemberID
password
Save Cookie?  
Get lost password

Join Us

Points Reference

NEW! PnP Contests
Member Contests
Contest Winners

Sailor Moon Home
Games

Members
Moonatics
Gold Writers
Silver Writers
Free Members

Galleries
Sailor Moon

Music
Sailor Moon
Christmas
Read !
Poetry
Stories
Books
Columns
Recipes
MoonNotes
Write !
Poetry
Stories
Books
Recipes
MoonNotes
Workshops
Poetry Workshop
Stories Workshop
Books Workshop
Reference
Poetry Help
Stories Help
F.A.Q

Programs
Sailor Moon Episodes
Banners
Resources

On Line
Rahmi Safitri
1 Writers

0 Free Members

1 Members
42 Guests

Soul Tears
by Shoshana Burda
copyright 11-03-2005


Age Rating: 13 to 127

 
The pouring rain sings
The song of sorrow in my heart
The screams of anguish
From my broken, bleeding soul
Crying because you are gone.



*please note: most of my poetry is very dark. Poetry is just a way I express myself. the things have nothing to do with my life.*




Spell Check Rhymer Poetry Analyst


Help Us Stop Plagiarism - Nearly all works at PnP are original. However a few people choose to plagiarize. To check, choose a phrase from the work, then either drag and drop to the search box or copy and paste. click on search and works at Google will be shown which match. Just to be sure, please do this before you recommend or rate the work highly...
Google
If you think this work is plagiarized please


Select a Random Work
from Poetry

Comments on this Article/Poem:
Click on the commenter's name to see their Author's Page

03-22-2006 Angela Toshner    

this is really good. I like short poems myself but most people dont really write them because they think they havent fully finished it if its too short.
angela
12-13-2005 Deborah Thomas    

Or,
'the screams of anguish
Cry out!
From my broken, bleeding soul
Crying because you are gone'
But, if not for Deone's remarks, I would have overlooked the alternate possibilities. I would have accepted it as it is written, and it is well written already, but you may like it better another way.. more dramatic, as Deone suggested.
As she says, you need not apologize for your style of writing.. it is your own style.
But, the explanation was helpful in understanding who you are.. and separating 'you' from your work.
Although, if it were never there, inside your own soul, how would you know it so well? (raised eyebrow)(wink)
11-10-2005 Deone Wiley    

There is no need to apologize for the tone of your poetry. This is a lovely expression of loss. The word "crying" softens the "angusish" I think. I would change crying to cries and have it in a line by itself. Then finish it with the because line. I think this is a stronger format. And more dramatic! Just a suggestion, to be sure. Try it, you might like it. All that aside, the poem is very good just the way it is. But the teacher in me sees revisions which I think make poems stronger and more evocative.
11-04-2005 Maya H.    

Nice! very dark. I like.keep it up!
11-03-2005 David Pekrul    

I'll never look at rain the same way again. This is very good.
Visitor Reads: 403
Total Reads: 435
Comments: 5

Author's Page

Email the Author

Add a Comment




Favorite of:


Send Page to a Friend
Points Reference Privacy
PnP Terms of Service Contact Us
  SEO Software

Visitors
View Stats