All My Love
by
Kelsey Furnell
(Age: 18)
copyright 11-11-2005
Age Rating: 4 to 127
Author's Note: This was written in iambic pentameter for a school project. If you are not familliar with iambic pentameter, google it! It's a nifty little thing in poetry, a method used by Shakespeare often.
I tried to hide my thoughts and all my love
I tried to keep them secret from the world
Yet in the end, I cannot change the fact
That I will always be a beast for e'er
The world will hate me, just as night hates day
They all will shun me, fear me ‘till I die
No matter what I try to do to change
My love, my heart will ache in darkness deep
This burden in my conscience I must keep
My worries will remain here to derange
They’ll haunt me ev’ry night with ev'ry cry
And if these thoughts should ever flee away
Then will the mem’ries leave me? No, they’ll ne’er
The hope I’ve needed I have always lacked
I tried to change my fate, but it unfurled
And in the end, I'm damned from great above
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Wow! I loved it! You do have a few spelling and grammar errors, but noting big. I'm a dark person overall and am always glad to find a new dark author. What a great and painful poem. I also include curses in my poems, and if it's a song you can almost grantee it. Very good, you described the pain and suffering of heart break. It's always hard to tell a person you love them, epically if they don't really see you in that way. We all fall in love, and if it's the right person we won't have our hears broken. It's surprisingly hard to tell someone that loves you that you don't feel the same way. It's not really what the poem is about, but I thought I'd add that. Rejection, hear break, and pain... Very good, I hope to read more dark poems by you. keep up the good work.
not bad..I'm glad you're using iamic peramiter (I'll never spell that right) I think its great you used an unfamiliar (well to most pnpers probably) style. I hope you get an A on your poem
Cool how you wrote in iambic pentameter! I'd never be able to do that, it's just beyond my range of abilities. I have to say, I agree about being perplexed. But it's really good, and really impressive!
Welcome !
