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My Friend
by Deone Wiley
copyright 11-10-2005


Age Rating: 10 to 127

 
He is
My friend; he holds
me fast within his arms
to chase away my heart's despair.
He touches my soul with his sweet murmurs
telling me that life will be good;
that he is always there.
Oh, what a friend
He is!



** My first attempt at a rictameter.


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11-14-2005 Jean George    

Nicely done Deone...This is a challenging form as it does force the writer to strictly adhere to the poetic form. It is also a very good way to discipline oneself to stick to the poetic 'law' of no wasted words. It also forces one to stay focused on the point as one must return to the beginning in a few short syllables....again, very well done. The poem itself is very touching and reads well regardless of the form.
11-13-2005 Roger Crique    

I particularly do not like any form that interrupts my fluidity. Rictameter form tends to do that to me, this is why I prefer free-verse. The fact that one has to count syllables, 2, 4, 6, 8, 10, 8, 6, 4, 2, as well as keeping in tune with one's idea or thoughts, it's a challenge for me. I'm glad to see that you did so well in your first attempt.
11-11-2005 James Shammas    

I have to be careful with ny comments since I'm not totally familiar with this form, but I get the gist, and I assume the pattern and the look of the piece is important here. I'm trying to relate the shape of the poem to its message, and see how the lines of varying length also have something to do with each line's importance and weight. I have to ponder this some more.
This is probably harder to write than it looks.

Jim
Visitor Reads: 279
Total Reads: 299
Comments: 3

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