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A Summer in Britain
Chapter 2
by Haley R. (Age: 15)
copyright 12-02-2005


Age Rating: 10 to 127

 
*Note: Before reading this read the first chapter that I accidentally put under stories, it's really important, and the story won't make much sense without it.

***************************************
Jules,

God! I hope the plane lands soon! I lost track of what time we took off, so I have no idea how long I've been here, but what I do know is that the fat guy sitting next to me is drooling on me and he's getting on my last nerve! Oh, and also if I haven't told you, I FAILED MY DRIVERS TEST! Ugh! Now, I can't drive all summer while I'm in Britain! I hope your summer's been going better than mine.

Oh, got to go, my meal came.

Tootles!

~May
*****************************

I put my laptop away and stared at the meal in front of me. *Wonderful, I said no mayo,* I mumbled as I pushed my plate away. I reached up and pushed the green button with a lady carrying a tray on it. Then, several moments later, a young women that couldn't have been over twenty-five came stumbling down the aisle. After finding her balance the women stood up straight and wheeled the cart in front of me.


"You called?" she said in a bored tone. Right after I heard her voice I could tell she was doing this just for a summer job or something like that.
"Yes. I asked for no mayo," I said, politely handing her my plate.
"Look, kid. I'm not in charge of this! You shouldn't call me about a stupid thing like mayonnaise! If you have complaints, complain to the pilot," she yelled. From what I could tell she'd had a very ruff day.
"Sorry..." I said quietly.
"Sorry? I have better things than to wait hand-and-foot on a spoiled kid! Sorry DOESN'T cut it!" she thundered.
"Hey, look," I started as I got out of my seat. Then I noticed I was taller than her by a good six inches, "All I did was ask for no mayo! You don't have to go all 'Stop being so selfish!' What the heck is wrong with you?! And I'm NOT a kid! I'm sixteen!" The women stared at me a cold, dark stare. I stared back just as good of a stare. We had a staring contest for several moments, then, finally, she reluctantly grabbed my plate and stomped away.
*Ha! Height advantage wins again* I thought to myself with a smirk. Though it wouldn't take much effort to be taller than that stewardess, I am pretty tall. I'm 5'10 and still growing, so my height always seems to come in handy.

I sat down, then noticed that the fat guy was awake and staring at me.
"What?" I asked as if I didn't do anything. I didn't get a response from him, all I got was blank stares. Noticing that the man wasn't going to respond, I watched the last of the stewardess disappear behind the curtain and triumphantly sat down. Then I reached into my bag and grabbed my iPod. I put the headphones into my ears and turned it on. Then, I looked back at "el fatso" and I noticed he was still staring. I grinned a fake grin back at him and took out my magazine and started to read. As I read more my smile started to fade.
*Ahh...Great...More fans...*




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Comments on this Article/Poem:
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02-27-2007 Alma H.    

This was really good. I love to read this story. A lot more high-tech than I'll ever be. -_- Oh, yeah, HIII ;D I agree with Sam. It wasn't that bad through. It reminds me of My own world side Crisis. You thought of this first though. I feel like I'm coping you. T.T Anyway, on to the next chapter. Talk to you later.
~Alma H.


06-03-2006 Sam Hackel-Butt    

"From what I could tell she'd had a very ruff day."
Ruff = rough

Again, I suggest placing text inside ** in italics.

I think maybe a bit more detail is needed on the stewardess, 'el fatso,' and possibly the narrator. Maybe say what kind of magazine she's reading. Maybe comment on 'el fatso's' eye color, as he's staring at the main character.

Watch out. I think using both ?! looks a bit sloppy. I suggest sticking with the ? and adding a few words to express the tone of voice being used.

So this means the stewardess is like... 5"4?

I love being tall. Me and the main character already have something in common! I use it to my advantage also. I also seem to lean to one side, making myself appear a few inches shorter, but when I straighten out, I'm quite tall. It comes in handy when you need to stare someone down.

-Sam
Of the Commenting Crusaders


04-11-2006 Jane L.    

Great but, I don't think you can be a flight attendance for a summer job. YOu have to take a test a everything. And like you have to be tall and pretty and like you have to learn how to walk and like its really hard. And you'll get fired you shout at someone


12-02-2005 Mehrina B.    

Heh, this story tells us a little something about the newest character in the Books workshop! Great job, Haley! I really like it, except for the fact that it is too small. Like cliffhangers. I can't stand cliffhangers! I'm eager for more!


12-02-2005 Leigh G.    

Good work. Even though you should of retyped the first chapter in this category and then submitted this. Well not to the point. Your spelling is better. Has Mehrina already edited this? Either way I like your characters, and they way you write. Funny too. :) Good work E-mail me when you submit the next chapter. I also like the way the story unfolds so to speak. You can lower the age rating though. This is defiantly 7 and up.


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