Old soldiers fade away
And I for one feel trampled
Into the dusts of yesterday
Like a piano so out of tune
Even the best piano tuners
can do nothing but make it
Go "PLINK", "PLANK", "PLUNK"

I look into the mirror
At my gray head and think,
"I'm too young to be as old as this!"
I'm so old I still remember when
People were smarter than machines
My grandchildren make fun of me
They tell me I was born in the
Year of Our Lord only knows,
Well, at least I know
More about being young
Than they know about being old

Oh well they tell me
I'm still a likable old codger
Even though I drive my car
Like a horse-drawn buggy
And I supplement my diet
With dog food
Although, waiters don't like me
They tell me I tip like it was
Still the "twenties"

I can still go out to eat,
Watch TV, or go to the movies
But if I try to do them,
All on the same day
I must be fed intravenously

Old age is nothing but
Endless waves of pain,
Mashed bone and flesh
Instead of knees,
Forgetting things that happened
Only five seconds ago,
Thumping temples, swimming vision,
Spitting-up and falling-down,
And so on


I have such little time left
Why do I still dream of
Re-inventing the world?
Old age makes me feel
Like an old book
Set way back in a dark corner
Of a library gathering dust,
---Soon---It will be covered!