I'd Like to Give You Some
by
Richard Reed Jr
copyright 04-20-2006
Age Rating: 10 to 127
Sweets
Sweet
As long as they're
Not too
Sweet
Heart I love you more than the dawn
And more than the sun
In
The skies
Could never be
The limit
That
Could ever be found
There seem to be too many hates in the world
And certainly too few
Bicycles
Built for two
Such as you and me
Too many crows a'cawing, though
Blue birds
We have not
Enough of this talking of sad songs
Your kiss is my ballad of life
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I wonder how many went to bed
with this line repeateing in their head
I wonder who partook of this
and and in the end didn't feel remiss
For no matter how many points
I do or don't, can or can't give it
Just know it deserves more
and if I had a contest, this would surely win it!
You've obviously touched a cord with many here, and probably even more who haven't commented. I hope you know the extent to which you touch the lives of others when you share your talent with us all. Thank you!
The form and content complement each other very nicely in this poem. You really bring to life the need for the simple, loving things (bicycles, kisses, etc) that make the world not only tolerable, but joyous. Good job, especially with the form.
Aww, that was really sweet! And once again, I just love the way some words make part of one sentence, and make another part of another sentence! Wonderful!
I always like your poems. They're so unique and such a delight to read. It's like thinking! Normally, a lazy bum wouldn't like to think at all, but when they start thinking of nice stuff, like ice cream and candy and yellow and green, they like what they think. I really like what I read in your works! Great job!
*By the way, I believe the last line melted everyone's heart who has read this!!!
Ahhhhhhh this was sooo sweet. I am truly awed by the romance and beauty of this poem. There is no girl out there that wouldn't melt at the sound/sight of this poem. Amazing write, keep it up.
Your friend Tabby.
This is a very nice piece, it's romantic to say the least... This is a sweet poem, even though I'm not much for love poem, but this was good. I couldn't find any spelling or grammar problems, and I liked the lack of punctuation. It's the style that I'm fond of, for the most part. This was a good poem, and I'm glad you're finally posting again. I hope for something darker next time... Good work, keep writing!
May the divine darkness be with you,
Leigh of the Commenting Crusaders
Welcome !
