My father did drugs and was an alcoholic. He was highly controllive and abusive. He used to beat up my mother until she was black and blue. I tried to get help, but no one believed me. We had no where to go and no help. We felt hopeless. We starved most of the time and school was a way for us kids to eat. My mother worked and my father partied most of the time.

I was seven years old when I was raped from behind.I never told a soul. (To this day my mother doesn't know all that happened. )The rape stopped at age 12. When we finally left my father. We went to a place for battered women and children. I dealt with my depression and suicide attempts. I finally went into counseling. Which I hated at the time.
Finally, I went to church and everything began to change. I began to change my life around. I stopped my suicide attempts, which has been 4 to 5 years now since then.

My mom got married to a wonderful man. My depression is gone and so are my suicide attempts. Now, I love life and have a different perspective on life. Now, I can have dreams, hopes, desires and happiness thanks to my step-dad, Tom. I even got the honor to meet my brother for the first time. Which is a wonderful gift that I cherish. My father has passed away back in 2004, I believe, with drugs in his system.

I am now in college. I want to become a sign language teacher, a councelor, photographer and a writer. As you can tell, I have many goals to complete.


I am sharing my life with you all for one reason. If you are/ going through something like this, don't give up hope.There is never to little or to much hope. We survived through this. How? God was there. Through him, we survived.

So never give up hope or your dreams, because that is like giving up life. Without life, you would be empty inside. I hope you will consider what I'm saying if you are thinking of suicide. Don't do it. It's not worth it. Yeah, parents yell at you. That is because they love you and want you to grow. Not that they hate you. Parents love their children and we may grow to be adults, but in your parents eyes, you are still their little girl or little boy. In their eyes, you never grow up. My mother says that all the time. Like one of my sayings,

" You maybe young or old, but if you are young at heart, you'll never be old."