Weeping With the Willows
by
BJ Niktabe
(Age: 50)
copyright 08-28-2006
Age Rating: 10 to 127
I finally found my book of poetry from my youth. This was one of my first few poems at the age of 14, and it was written in April of '72. Back then, I wrote the date of the writing on each poem. My fascination of nature was evident even then. I had never heard of imagery at this point in my life.
As the clouds above pass quickly by
While the candles still burn bright,
I suddenly break down and cry
While the sun brings the morning light.
The moon is slowly fading out
While the stars fall fast asleep.
I don't know why I start to pout.
With the weeping willows, I weep.
When the sun is high up in the sky,
While the flowers blossom wide,
The trees outside will stand up high
While I sit and weep inside..
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This a very sad poem for a fourteen year old girl. Also shows the talent that would blossom later in your wonderful poems of today.
Even then your structure was tight and smooth.
Actually, I had stayed up all night with two of my sisters. We burned candles (and yes, unfortunately cigarettes, too) all night long while writing poetry (and not a tear was shed). There was no love story, other than those long ago dreams that so many teens then and now have (I think). ;)
Beautiful. All was said before me..
I, too, love the images that you bring with 'the stars falling fast asleep'. Kinda soothing,(I was almost rocking a little, until the next line) yet it tells of someone who has been awake all night..(raised eyebrow)
My next favorite part is 'while the flowers blossom wide'.
You being 14 and noticing all of the beauty of nature, all the while weeping, gives a hint of a love story... such as one would have at 14.
I'll have to write about Tuffy one day. The crush that does not even remember my name.
By the way, were you grounded? (grin)
Agghh... I KNOW I commented on this. Sigh... But I'm sure glad I came back to read this again so that I can try and leave a comment again. Sorry it's not there. Not sure what happened. :-(
Anyway, I love willows (as does DJ) and any poem about them intrigues me.(Especially YOURS). Not sure if I told you in person or in my comment that's disappeared, but I really like the image of the stars falling asleep. We always speak of the sun going to sleep, but never the stars when morning comes. It was a fresh image and a new idea that I really liked. Thank you for sharing it and I can't wait to read more from your "treasured" collection!
BJ, even at the tender age of 14, your poetry must have brought sorrowful emotions to the mind of te reader. This poem reminds me of the clown who laughs on the outside, while crying on the inside. I'm glad you shared it with us.
Nancy
There is more here than meets the eye! I am one who believes that art transcends the body and soul. Hormones? Perhaps, but to me hormones are more apt to induce instability in writing, rather than the literature that I see here. I personally believe that this piece, at the time of conception was a true inspiration caused by the muse that resides in all of us, except that some of us do not allow its fruition. This is evident in the duality of the poem. It deals with Summer (the warmth and exciting time of life we all cherish, but the passing clouds indicate (time) and how constant change can be. Sometimes we have an indescribable need to weep and we don't know why. The willows are always standing tall, allowing the breeze to do its damage. This poem is life in progress and for a fourteen year-old child to think along those lines demonstrates to me that life is more than just living! Great write! Lots of imagery and flows outstandingly smooth!
Yes, the imagery is great and the poems says volumes with each persons interpretation. I agree with Brian, that your emotions at the time could have simply been teenage hormones. (The teen years are pretty strange, aren't they!) The emotions could also have been from things that were going on in your life at the time, which you have now possibly forgotten. Either way, this is a great write.
A very curious poem. You were fourteen with your hormones running wild, is that the reason you wept? It appears a very simple poem, but then it could be speaking volumes.
I wish that I still had my writings from years ago.
Welcome !
