Tears came down. I curled into the corner. Drunk on shadows, I day-dreamed nightmares. Rain poured outside with the early morning hours. I couldn't move. I let the uncontrollable wave of pain consume me without struggle. It was unending and merciless. Thunder echoed softly outside... I think... Maybe... It didn't matter... I reached out, scrambling in the dark for something to make the pain disappear. I never found it... just the ring on a chain. I whispered incoherences to the damp air of the rainy night. How pathetic and miserable. I found myself retching suddenly into the trash bin... I shook... I crawled back into my covers, into the comfortless, light-less world I had created. I passed out............ Dreams of a funeral..... Rowan trees.... Black marble........ Gothic cathedral... Forest... Holy water..................... You...... holding ......... saying ......... Sudden wakefulness.... An alarm clock ran on a cellular phone. I slammed it, sinking back into bed. God... What had happened? I was dizzy and sick... I didn't know... I forced myself out of bed. Shower... Hot... Burning my flesh.... but somehow it felt good. The dim light hurt my eyes. I turned the knob and the water stopped. I picked up the towel and tried not to look at the marks. I dressed.... I cried.... "Get through the day....... Your angel has gone...."