Age Rating: 13 +
I thought we'd be friends forever,
but I'm realizing I don't want to be--
the sky breaks and cries it's frozen eyes,
and our castle is crumbling under the weight
of your lies.
It's a fortress built on grief;
I thought that would make it stronger,
but desperation gave birth to a bond
that's beat was off course,
it had too strong of heart murmurs.
And I can't pinpoint the day when I lost
respect for you,
but I wonder if you ever had it for me,
or took one word or hope for any of this
with a thread of sincerity.
This is reality...
I've never been the one to dump a friend
--they always dropped me,
and for the first time in my life,
I'm pulling out for my own sake.
I can't fix you...
...I can't hurt for you when you want to escape
or worry if my hope for you came too late,
or think of the all the possibilities
when you don't answer your phone,
because I still see the way
you looked overdosed at home.
I'm crumbling inside of this shell of me.
You're a weakness I can't afford
if I want to be free,
and while I love you,
I can't let myself be destroyed for you.
I can't fix you,
I can't help you,
and I can't watch you do this to you.
Until you pull yourself loose,
I won't enable you,
I can't be there for you,
I can't handle you treating every word
like a joke.
And I can't handle you.
Comments on this Article/Poem:
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Very good write. I understand and felt the feelings you put into that.
Richard Reed Jr
This is a super piece, well-written, with deep impact and extreme poignancy.
Something we can all relate to. It hurts.
Especially -though you've ended the friendship; you can never end the memory of the friendship.
Great write my friend,
Sometimes losing a friend is the hardest thing you can do. But later as they realize what a good friendship they've wasted, they eill come back. Because a good friend doesn't judge you, the simple are just there.
Very intense, but I have to say, you must be strong for yourself. At times like this, you are the only one you can count on, and you can't let yourself down. Stay strong, and don't let a friendship pull you under as you try to save it. Sometimes letting go is the best thing you can do, no matter how hard it is.
Leigh Gilholm Fisher
Very good! I enjoyed this dark poem, because you have a good choice of words and flow here. My only grammar/spelling complaint is that you capitalize the start of each line. Although I know many authors don't capitalize every line and it's not really a grammar error, the extent of my mastered-grammar is probably complete sentences that make sense, capitalization and punctuation! My friend and editor, Mehrina B., is slowly changing that though...:) Sorry, got a little off-topic! Anyway, half of the friendships we lead aren't things that last forever. People change, as do relationships. Friendships can hurt as much as love, but personally I kinda feel they're easier to control. Love is still new to me, and my one experience with it ending in me crushing the feeling, but friendship I'm a little more familiar with. I also know that is slower than love, although I know it can morph into brotherly or sisterly love, I've always found it simpler. I enjoyed this piece, and thanks for entering my contest! It feel like it's been a while since I got an entry without asking the person to enter... Anyway, great work, keep writing!
Leigh of the Commenting Community
P.S. Are you going to continue Chronicles of The Week?
I gotta admit, You got me. My eyes actually brimmed up on the latter part of this potentially excellent verse. Solid (though sad) theme and development. I like it. Could use a spot of editing, though, as it's still a bit rough around the edges.
A perfect run in words and image, emotion laid out on the sleeve, poetic in verse and tale, craft is great message sad.. Walt