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Shannon Walter
Chelsea Rothe
Zoey Green
3 Free Members

3 Members
28 Guests

----

Because of Me
by Shannon Walter (Age: 18)
copyright 07-11-2007


Age Rating: 1 to 127

 
I am a poet writing my pain,
I am a girl who is secretly going insane.

My mom is sick, I can't help but feel it's my fault,
Because of me, my mom's life is at a halt.

There is nothing I can do,
I wish that the both of us always didn't feel so blue.

It is all my fault, my mom's never ending pain is Because of me,
Because of me she is suffering so, can't you see?




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07-13-2007 Leah G.    

This is a good work. I've blamed myself for some bad things too and this poem really captures that hurting emotion. I feel like most of the poems you write have great ideas, but have forced rhymes. Try rephrasing some lines and make the poem longer. I want to hear more of what your thinking in the poem!

Leah
Visitor Reads: 503
Total Reads: 523
Comments: 1

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