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Vivya Cristina
Kazu Siro
2 Free Members

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Mother
by Leah G. (Age: 15)
copyright 04-15-2007


Age Rating: 10 to 127

 
Arms fold around me
As tears creep down each eye
Memories haunt me
Her soothing words calm me as I cry

They say that they hate me
This is a world of abhorrence and fright
Their mean words and jokes stab me
But in everything dark there is light

Horrible things have been done to me
I am a traveler alone
I'm looking for a roof to shelter me
Yet my spirit has learned and grown

Worries surround me
About my confidence and beauty poor
But my Mother’s hands come around me
And for a second I fear no more


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04-06-2008 Lauren T.    

Another beautiful poem from you.
This one almost made me cry. I think writing to mothers is a beautiful way to tell them that you love them, or that you're thankful for them being there for you. No problems here, once again. Good work.
05-03-2007 Leah G.    

My mom was there for me through all of my tough times. I would give it to her for Mother's day, but she's read it. After I wrote it, I left it out on my desk. When I came home from school, she was there, holding the poem and crying. I still have the original copy that's wrinkled and has spots from her tears.
04-28-2007 Alma H.    

This would be a great poem for Mother's day. Mothers are always there when you've had a bad day. They cheer you up when you're down, and sometimes, they're your best friend, or your worst enemy. Either way, they are there because they want you to feel better. Really good poem all together. Talk to you later.
~Alma H.
04-16-2007 David Pekrul    

I think this is a good start, but I found one part a little confusing.
"Her soothing words calm me as I cry

They say that they hate me"

I know that the first line of the second stanza is referring to others around you, not your mother, but on the first read I assumed that the words of hate that you refer to are 'Her soothing words calm me as I cry.' Perhaps this could be rewritten so the reader isn't confused about the persons speaking these words.

A little re-writing and this will be great.
Visitor Reads: 314
Total Reads: 345
Comments: 4

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