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On Line
Jeanette Broussard
Sam Hackel-Butt
2 Writers

Jerry Downing
1 Free Members

3 Members
21 Guests

Hysteria
by Mark Lawson (Age: 21)
copyright 04-30-2007


Age Rating: 13 to 127

 
Running
Rapid thoughts
Chasing
Every Step
Haunted
My M I nd
Clouded
Where am I?
Lost...
Alone...
Frightened
Strange people
Leering
Laughing
Chasing...chasing...running
Running
Far
Eluding
No one
Hiding
Waiting
Tired
Found...found...NO!...
Running...running
Leave me...
...alone
Caught
No..NO...
LET GO!
Help...me
No one
There
Can't stop
Fighting
Clawing
No
Tired
Alone
Let go...
...please?
Help
Help me
Help me
Help me
Someone...something
Touching
Shaking me
Eyes
Closed
Forcing open
Glancing quickly
The surroundings
Strangers
Staring
Whispering
Stricken
Illusion
Felt so...real
Slowly
Cautiously
Gaze around
Taking in the sights
Breathing deep the aroma
Acrid
Burning my lungs
Rising slowly to my feet
Onlookers silent
Harmless
NO..CAN'T BE
Running
...Running
......Escape
Shame
Mesmerized followers
Raging behind my footsteps
Drawing closer
I hear them
Quickly spinning around
I see them
Fight them as they overtake me
So tired
Surrender
To their harsh embrace
Tears
Flowing
Weak
It'll be OK
Safe
Soft padding beneath my feet
Alone once more
Away from myself.


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Comments on this Article/Poem:
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05-27-2007 Lyle Berry    

Ilike this stream of consciousness type of story - poem. It captures the imagination. However, I was waiting for a more moving conclusion that never happened. With a lttle more work on the ending, I feel this could be improved and made more powerful. Best Regards, Lyle
05-01-2007 Samantha P.    




05-01-2007 Samantha P.    

This poem was very freaky. It reminds me of one of my past experineces with some people (wont go into detail) I like how you used your words and capitilized certain words to indicate a sort of yelling. One thing that was wierd was in line 6 'My M I nd' I don't know if that is supposed to be like that but im pretty sure it's not. WEll I don't know what you where thinking when you wrote this but if it is a past experience I hope it is imaginary and no one has been hurt. Another thing I find wierd about this poem is that there are ony 1 to 4 words on every line and that to me just seems a bit wierd. You don't use a lot of words to describe the situation but it was still very interesting and the few words you did use where detailed. This is overall a really good piece and I hope to read more like it exceot maybe in a more happier sense.
Samantha of the CC
05-01-2007 Brian Dickenson    

I agree with the earlier comments so there is little point in reiterating them.
That said, I did find this an intriguing write. I conveyed a sense of terror and bewilderment.
It was like the dream we have when we wake up in a cold sweat, thankfully to realise we are still in our own bed.
I think this piece will mean many things to those who read it.
Visitor Reads: 275
Total Reads: 316
Comments: 4

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