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 04-03-2008 Shannon Jaime
This is a very beautiful, vivid, melancholy piece. I love the structure, the imagery, the alliteration, especially the lines "Scurry like a clicking crab / Across the cold concrete / Crying." The joint references to summer and autumn remind me of Tennyson's poem, "Tears, Idle Tears," which also juxtaposes a season of warmth, joy, and beauty with one of loneliness and imminent death. The inclusion of the word "green" at the end, however, does seem to suggest that the memory of spring, of hope, will never truly die.
Lovely work.
Sincerely,
*S*
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07-21-2007 Riona Evers
Wow wonderful piece of poetry Frank! I love the sentimentality and the melancholic 'mood' that you portrayed in this one. Falling leaves are somewhat symbolic to the nature of sadness, the lost, and the ever-advancing march of time, and you did a magnificent job in capturing the spirit of these subjects.
The format of this piece is another well-deserved praise. The 'linking words', as Ms. Samantha mentioned, does support the unity of the line previous and the next, not to mention the whole poem itself. They also stand out from the rest of the lines; emphasizing the meaning of these words.
I can't help but wonder if the meaning of the poem is pertinent to a human life? Or perhaps death itself? Maybe I am over-evaluating the whole subject; Summer Leaves is about the splendor of nature? Ach, assessing poetry sometimes destroys the beauty of a poem. XD
Well, Frank, another remarkable words from a remarkable poet! Bravo! ^_^
(P.S. - I apologize about the 'very-late' comment..)
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07-03-2007 Richard Reed Jr
Beautiful -absolutely beautiful. Your poem puts life into nature an pictures it so well,
I can almost feel that I am outside and feeling
nature at its grandest and most powerful.
A most melancholy piece, I think, but I like melancholy as I think you know.
Great job as usual. I've come to expect a great read from you every time I come, and I'm never disappointed.
Thanks William,
Rich
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07-02-2007 Frank Fields
It's impossible to receive that kind of praise and not give something back.
Thank you, Sam.
Frank :)
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07-02-2007 Sam Hackel-Butt
Oh Frank, t'is simply dazzling! It took me like, a second to get into this. I don't think I've encountered a poem in a format like this, or that I know of. I enjoyed the 'linking' words that went with both the lines previous, and the lines after. The words were shared, they divided, yet united. The images are still with me. I simply love Autumn. Autumn and Spring, the transitional seasons that hold so much beauty. Though this poem targeted Summer, I feel like it's late Summer when the leaves begin to turn.
Thanks for this :)
-Sam
Of ze CC
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07-02-2007 Frank Fields
And so 'tis done. The age to ten, and a little bit more here and there. It may yet become an obedient child and not want to run helter-skelter like a summer leaf caught in the wind.
I want all my children to be recognized and to still be polite and well-behaved while they are someone's guest for a brief moment, if not more.
Thanks Leigh ^^
Frank :)
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07-01-2007 Leigh G.
*first comment and hit dance* (R)
This is a nice little poem! The passing of seasons are interesting to watch, but are often overlooked due to how we get used to them and are often thought of begrudgingly by those who don't like the cold or hot. People are too picky for their own good, ya? Then again, we all overlook things that we should be more appreciative to. It's best just to try to take things slow, try not to rush too much, and just try taking everything in.
Oh, and in partial reply to your e-mail...the main reason I've been so behind with PnP is because in the summer I can't go on line during the day because it blocks up the phone lines. Also, many people on PnP that read a work are too lazy to comment. Also, when something is out of the workshop non-members can read it. They appear as hits, and also bring up the number. I try not to pay too much attention to hits, myself... Anyway, good work! Keep it coming!
Leigh of the Commenting Community
P.S. You could make this 10+. Keeping things at 10+ will also help you get more comments. :) (I don't think we have any members on the site that take part in commenting and reading below the age of ten.)
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