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Sanctuary Of The Damned
by
Frank Fields
copyright 07-16-2007
   
Age Rating: 10 +
Hush! Now do not make a sound,
In quiet stillness we abound,
Our lives adrift on cresting tide,
But ever onward do we stride.
Hush! It comes now near around,
Quiet courage on this holy ground,
Once where ancient devils cried,
Hungered in their blood they died.
Hush! The danger nearly found,
A crackling twig to break resound,
But now, this time, we must abide,
Our souls endangered, sorely tried.
Hush! The final damage crowned,
As king and victor draped and gowned,
In evilness it did confide,
The souls of all to it were tithed.
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Comments on this Article/Poem:
Click on the commenter's name to see their Author's Page
     
03-31-2013
Rachel Brown
Words of a true poet indeed
I love it, such a flowing meaningful tapestry.
It has the rhythm that most poets take for granted. This I do know of this artistic piece a religious poem has most meaning on holy days like Easter. I really enjoyed reading this poem.
Five Stars for your hard work.
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02-03-2008
Walter Jones
Your gift is the capture and hold of the reader, pulling thoughts and images to full bloom, I often find good poetry, but yours is of a different quality it gives artistic review, while teaching acceptance. A great write.. Walt
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10-04-2007
Shannon Jaime
I love the taut rhythm of this piece; the tension is almost tangible, yet is also very focused. Needless to say, the imagery gives this work an epic, mystical quality, which really helps to enhance the solemn tone. I can almost imagine that this poem is an account of a martyr, or some holy solider, during a Crusade.
The last stanza seems somewhat ambiguous, though perhaps I am misreading it completely. I think it is very interesting that you describe the final damage as being "crowned," as it could refer to a sort of sanctification, or the consummation of a trying spiritual journey, or victory on a battlefield--though there seems to be just a hint of irony in that phrase. I do think, however, that the last two lines are particularly intriguing. Is "it" the battlefield, or evilness? Was the price of victory paid with the souls of those who fought for sanctuary, perhaps? Or did some souls become partly steeped in sin in order for victory to be achieved?
In summary, this was quite an engaging read. I look forward to reading more of your work.
Sincerely,
*S*
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07-25-2007
Leigh Gilholm Fisher
Very nice! You have a way with titling pieces, when I saw this on your page my first thought was, "Oh, s#!t! I'm way behind!" and my second was, "Sanctuary Of The Damned? Sounds cool! Oy, I oughta read the older one first though..."
Wonderful wording, ideas, and simply captivating themes conveyed perfectly! I could picture and imagine what was going on very well. Your more recent poems seem to be on the short side, but in this case it doesn't take away from the piece at all. Great rhyming too, by the way. Overall, this is a really great piece! Keep it coming!
Leigh of the Commenting Community
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07-21-2007
Riona Evers
Wow! (Third, lol.) Quite dark, yet an imposing piece this is. Just reading the title sends chills down my spine! However, the contents of the poem is just grand. Your descriptions of this 'Sanctuary' was enough, perhaps more, to paint a vivid portrait in my mind. I love how you expressed this place as a "holy ground" and "where ancient devils cried". It seems as if I was reading about a place in a fable or an heroic tale.
My! It seems now you often incorporate rhymes into your works! The fluidity of this piece is utterly outstanding. Smooth-to-the-touch, if you will. XD The repetition of "Hush!" gives the audience the spirit of the Sanctuary of the Damned; the severity of silence stressed, in fright of the demons. In four stanzas you were able to create a whole world. Indeed, very nicely written.
Bravo, Frank! ^_^
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07-17-2007
Toni Sweeney
WOW!!! This poem is really really awesome. It gave me the chills and made me cry a few tears. I really enjoyed this poem. I am really looking forward to reading some more of your poems. :) this is a 5+++++ poem.
Toni
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07-16-2007
Samantha Powers
wow that gave me some serious chills
i love reading poems with big words i understand!!
lol i didnt see any errors but im not the best editor
i love how at the beginning of every phrase you say hush that is so cool. thats what really gave me the chills
and the descrpition just made a great painting in my mind
i love how you make it seem quiet it seems like theres a lot of tension and one false move like a snapping twig will cost you your life.
great poem
Antha
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