08-17-2012
Adam David Mckim
This is very creepy but I love it. I enjoy poems with a sense of darkness in it. Although I don't understand the title, I'm sure there is a deep meaning in it. Great write. Keep up the work.
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12-19-2007
Rikki Visser
Odd...I could have sworn i'd commented this before...
Oh well! Fantastic work! It's so morbid it's beautiful! One of your shorter works, which makes it that much more rare and valuable. it takes serious skill to be short and still rock. actually...it takes serious skill to not be incredibly long winded like absolutely none of your poems are. Ok, let's just say it takes serious skill to writ like you, and leave it at that. will that suffice?
hmmm...that last line sounds almost like what you wanted to happen to me when i interrupted ure studying last night...hmm...
*runs away when you turn your back*
naw,i'm just kidding.
Amazing Job, Saphire/Smurf/Antha/Sammy-san!
Luvs,
Ikkir
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09-10-2007
Frank Fields
OMG!! Why didn't I see this before? And comment on it? Is so very good, dark and twisted, but good. And more than good. Is almost ebil, the way sometimes things creep inside and have to be exorcised through our writings. This reminds me of that kind of "thing" that you just had to get out before it started to rot away in your own self. I'm glad you got it out.
Frank :)
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07-19-2007
Leigh Gilholm Fisher
Nice! It's out of your usual type of poems. Is this for Sam's "Experimental Pieces" contest? Lemme look...ah yes, it is. I've been try compose a poem for that contest to, but words just won't come to me in a normal way never mind an original way... Heh, anyway!
My only pick is I suggest you use proper capitalization. You can change that after the contest, if you want. Good flow, with nice and dark themes. I also like your rhymes in here, even though they seemed a bit forced. Nice work on this piece! Sorry for the delayed comment...
Leigh of the Commenting Community
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07-19-2007
Brittney N. Nasca
Woah! This is an excellent poem Samantha! It starts off so beautifully and then ends so suddenly. Your imagery is simple, yet perfect and the flow is wonderful. The ending certainly wasn't expected with the way the poem had started, and it such a strong impact. It took me aback a bit and I had to reread it to make sure I wasn't misreading it. Very excellent. Keep it up.
~Brittney~
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07-18-2007
Richard Reed Jr
Whoa!
What power -what creativity and imagination.
Kind of gives me the creeps though, LOL.
I guess that's what it supposed to do.
I love the imagery.
Great write,
~rich
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07-18-2007
Emily Garwood
Wow kinda dark for you that isn't it? very well written and expressed though, i have one question what does that have to do with natural silence i admit the title caught my eye but i dont see it maybe i'm too asleep i don't know but it's a good piece anyways keep up the work and be happy byeeee
Emy
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