You were my only friend.
I loved you.
I could've worked out.
But I...
Got...
...
...Confused...
?
I left my love behind,
For bigger things.
I just...
Don't know.
If I love you.
You were too late.
I love someone else.
And you know.
But...
He doesn't return my affection.
You know that too.
We've always trusted each other.
But I still don't know.
If I love you.
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I remember the day I read this. You acted like you were so confused, I hope you realize the path you chose is the right one and that it will help you grow stronger and maybe make love less confusing.
Your words, how ever simple make this poem powerful. Love is such a confusing thing, is it not? Things change and are confusing.
For a time I thought I liked one of my best friends who told me he used to like me! Man was I confused! Great Job.
-Laur
Such simple words can have a big impact. Did this really happen? I loved the way you out down the confused-ness at the beginning. It gives it more of how you feel...unconnected, confused. It seems you left someone, but you still have feelings for them, but tried to get rid of them by going after someone else. Seen it. Not me, but I help my friends a lot. Well, really good. Keep it up. Talk to you later.
~Alma H.
In my opinion, if you don't know whether or not you love somebody,
you probably don't. At least that has always been my experience, for what it's worth.
Neeeeeways, I loved the poem although it does seem rather sad.
The technical aspects of the poem, I can't quibble over. It's very well-written and flows well with powerful words, phrases, and sentiments,
I felt like crying.
When love doesn't get returned, its heart breaking. Don't ever forget friends!!
I can't point out much except for each is spelt wrong. xD I'm being a Grammar nut.
Good job.
The trials of being young! It's hard to know the difference between love and friendship sometimes, but both take really knowing the other well. Mere sensual attraction is not love, though it may feel like it at the time. As you write, there's no easy out here. I like the simple, direct style of the poem, and the ambiguous ending, which I also find kind of sad. It's a really good write.
Wayne
This is so reminiscent of young love and the uncertainty, the confusion, the passion one day, the cooled embers the next. I also like the way it ended. With an indirect reference to where it began. The form and format also accent the troubled soul. I'm not a terribly big fan of experimental types, unless they reinforce the meaning behind the work. This one does. Just enough. A nice touch.
On the grammar, the third line is confusing. Syntax mostly. And about the the 3rd or 4th line from the bottom, the word "eack" should be spelled, "each"? Little things, but with a short piece and an unusual layout, any grammatical error, especially is going to stop the reader.
Oh, this is about one of my friends who told me recently that he loved me. I used to love him that way, too, but... I don't know anymore. I mean, he's still my friend, but...
Hmmm, I'm a little confused in this one! I didn't really like the lay-out of the first paragraph. At first, I thought you were talking about the sisterly or brotherly love you feel for your one friend, and the love you feel for a guy. But in the end, I was confused. To me, friendship love can be gained with time. Couples love is either there, or it isn't in many situations. If you could clear this poem up a bit I think it'd a be a good idea.
Either way, good work! I like the idea, and you're a very good poet with the non-Sailor Moon poems. Keep 'em coming!
Welcome !
