Dance With Me.....
by
Frank Fields
copyright 09-09-2007 Contest Winner
Age Rating: 13 to 127
Picture Credits:
for Samantha P.
Come now, dance with me
Under the stars this night
And let our cares and fears
Be washed away
As in tune we're timed
Our bodies one and one
With a graceful sway
We step so gently soft
Upon the sands of time
To leave a trail of glitter
Wonder in sparkling sand
Dancing to the Pipes of Pan
All else is gone, save your delight
Of Jasmine on the wind with
Lilac scent so lightly carried by
The doves of love of snowy white
Partnered with a humming bird
And angel faerie swaying in time
With the lovers' step as one
All the Folk are gathered round
To give witness to this love's
Delight of needing nothing more
Than it's own love to give it measure
For their love so pure
The angels wept and caught their tears
In magick flask to cast into
The sky and so were born the stars
Above in Heaven's every corner.
Come now, dance with me
Under the stars this starry night.
~~~~
Author's Note
This work is now dedicated to Samantha P.
No one has ever been so touched by one of my writings that they wanted to become that writing. I can't imagine any higher praise than that--for a reader to want to become what the author has written. That kind of honest and heart-felt enthusiasm deserves something. The best that I can gladly offer is that her name will accompany this piece, wherever it goes.
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you recommend or rate the work highly...
This is beautiful....Stunning visuals and a smooth, flawless flow, you've done it again. I love this piece, everything about it is beautiful and gentle...the kind that makes you sway along while you read...
Once again, a brillaint work,,,keep it up!!!
Lovely work, Mr. Fields.
You outdo yourself again and again. Its utterly flawless to me, the rythm and...I just adore your writing. You have so much talent!
I can only hope to be as good as you are!
-Lauren
I came back to read again, seldom do I return to a work, but this one, has a road less traveled feel, more a direction in sound that brings comfort, my mind and ears, subjective I know, I do enjoy this piece a great deal.. Walt
This is an amazing work....twas hard to decide on which I was going to pick for my latest contest, and it was a toss up, but I wanted to let you know that I did enjoy this work of art, and hope to see it again in another contest I will be holding soon.
"All else is gone, save your delight"
Oh I quiet enjoyed this. It was so smooth and well put together (I suppose smooth implies that, but still) with beautiful language to go with the image.
I love the line which I posted above, it really jumps out at me, alongside the line about the angel faerie dancing with the humming bird. When I read this I immediately think of the jazz routine done by Hok in 'So You Think You Can Dance'.
That may sound really random, but it's what I see... something ethereal, graceful and spellbinding.
Wonderful!
"Tis done, with thoughts that you were right. The entire tone plus the image is too sensual, even sensitive for an age rating of 10+. Thanks, Leigh. ^_^
This was a very nice piece, and I really enjoyed it, but I highly recommend you make it 13+. The aspects of poem and picture make it more appropriate for that age group.
Ima! The poem! (ima = now) When I first saw the title, I thought to myself, "I wonder if it'll be like that song I wrote a few years back, 'Dancing With Someone Who Isn't There.' Isn't that a mouthful;? O_O Anyway, nice flow! I liked enjoyed reading this piece due to flow and choice of words. Your descriptions, as usual, made it easy to picture everything. You also tell stories in your work, I didn't notice how much better that makes things 'til I read that one poem you didn't do it in...
wooooow the way you've written it sounds like a far away dream one dreamt with so much love, light, and can't think of the word now had it a minute ago.....but it's a dance i'm sure people would never want to end. I really enjoy the way you write as every word seems so carefully placed and every word fits together perfectly as put there carelessly an amazing piece keep it up.
A masters touch with pause, old in taste and better of mind relax, as words grace our eyes so soft we reach for feelings held, a share with body and soul, a palette cleaned with love and care.. Walt
wow this sounded so fantasy realistic i want to dance. lol and leave a sparkling glitter trail. i love how you spell magyk and faerie the right fantasy way and not how others do it sounds way cooler and looks way more unique.
The way you described every step, and how the bodies move as one was gorgeous, i totally wish i was ure poem, a beautiful dance
Samantha