Carleen
by
Everett (dale) Pogue
copyright 09-21-2007
Age Rating: 13 to 127
Carleen loved to wear those skin-tight dresses.
Her green eyes glowed like her scarlet tresses.
Some guys called her "wild"; they said she was fun.
Her kisses, they bragged, burned like the sun.
Carleen never once paid attention to me,
I was crazy for her one could easily see.
" Tell her you like her!", goaded the guys.
"Can't you see that look for you in her eyes?"
School days ended ,we all went our way.
Someone told me Carleen had moved out to L.A..
Almost forgot her, until late one night
I saw scarlet hair, like hers, near the light.
I married Juanita like folks said we would.
She came from a family,hard-working and good.
Juanita is proper, pretty and clean.
So why do I find that my mind's on...Carleen?
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you recommend or rate the work highly...
Excellent! A little bitter-sweet humor,, with a serious message told in a humorous way.
In my capacity as Leprechaun of the poets, I hereby proclaim you as king of the humorous poets!
The beginning made me think of a quote to describe tight stockings: "fat-sucking pantyhose." XD
Okay! I saw a typo:
She came from a family,hard-working and good.
Very simple one: you just forgot the space between the comma and hard-working.
I liked the poem! As usual, rhymes made things flow nicely. I like how you add some comedy to your pieces. Sure as hell beats the usual love poem. Good work here, keep it comin'!
Wow this was so like the world today it was amazing
your detail made me read it multiple times, and you described each detail perfectly. You did a great job at rhyming it and it blended perfectly.
Often times if we dont go after what we want, it slips away, yet we never forget. And it seems in this poem that since he didnt take his chance he chose second best, and in a way to get her of his mind he went with the opposite type of person.
This was a great poem, i love your work it means a lot to me
Samantha
CC comunity
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