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Random Person You Are On My Mind

by Samantha Powers (Age: 22)
copyright 03-11-2008


Age Rating: 1 +

Sideways is the way I walk
It's opposite, just like how you never talk.
One look from you and I can no longer move
Then you look away and I don't know what to do.
I never want your gaze to leave,
I hardly know you,
Yet you mean so much to me.
I want you to grasp my hand and hold me tight....
for you may not know,
but you are my secret light.
The words you don't say you write,
And I love all your opinions on life.
So maybe in time we will meet,
and I can show you just how much you mean to me?
Or maybe you will never notice me......






Visitor Reads: 769
Total Reads: 828
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        08-19-2012     Adam David Mckim        

I love this poem. I too have had these feelings in the past. A person you want to meet but yet you never know if it will ever happen or not. The thoughts of what could be are good but the pains of it never happening is a possibility too. Caught between love and lost at the same time but you never really had that love and lost it to begin with. Very good write.

        05-03-2010     phantomwrays        

I really enjoyed this, it's definitely one of those things you can't control, sometimes you just don't know why you are drawn to someone but I agree with Emily, just to have those feelings for someone is a wonderful thing.
Victoria

        03-18-2010     Emily Valle        

This was very sweet and innocent.
It made me picture a young girl, admiring someone from afar...I've been there before myself.
When we're young we can wrap our whole worlds around someone that we don't even know. Throwing caution to the wind as far as what's sensible and realistic and just enjoying the fact that you have those feelings for someone. Even if nothing will ever become of it.
Great write I enjoyed it!

        08-14-2008     Susan Brown        

I was impressed with the way you admired someone from afar (this random person) and formed a relationship with them in your mind. Now that was interesting. Maybe we'll meet? Maybe we won't, but that didn't really matter. Even still, you were getting something positive from listening to their words. I think, this is a pretty cool poem. That person being your secret light-nice!
Susan

        08-06-2008     Mary -BrytEyz- Ball        

I watched a movie today ("Definitely, Maybe") and then drove it back to the video rental store while my son and I listened to the music of MOULIN ROUGE. My evening climaxed with some wonderful poetry... "Random Person"... and now that it's come in threes, the other shoe has fallen... or tear for that matter.

Each a tale of unfulfilled love, each a desperate plea for it, each a hint of sweet salvation in it, each just short of eternal bliss with it. Sigh... And my night will end with echoes of Elton John, Bryan Adams singing "Sad Songs"...

Thank you for a rounding out my evening... with your whisper of hope and glimpse of faith in what could be, in what might be, in what the vision your heart sees. Thank you for this.

        06-05-2008     Anthony Lane Stahlhut        

Sometimes the relationship is better when you don't really know what they think. You have less chance of getting hurt, but you loose every chance of finding out if they feel the same. Easy to not find rejection, but sad to miss out on what could be true love. Sometimes we get hurt, but every once in a while we find happiness. The good far outweighs the bad! Keep em coming, Anthony

        03-31-2008     Wayne Thomas        

Something about a crush/fantasy that seems to explain all things. As I first began to read, I thought, just one more teenage gush/crush poem, knowing most crushes never pan out. But the ending got me in a grip--"maybe...we'll meet". What a depth of feelings buried in this little poem! Do some more! :)

        03-28-2008     Walter Jones        

Soft words used to convey magic, a write filled, extension of image used, voice played in conveyance of a clever message left, out standing package of poetry, a very difficult accomplishment completed... Walt

        03-28-2008     Kelley Appleby        

This has a wonderfully wispy feel to it. I like how you convey your interest in this object of your affection without over-writing it, or over-dramatizing things...

This is the case too many times when trying to explore feelings of unrequited love. When typical, age-old conditions are portrayed as bordering on obsession, I find it unnerving.

Your effort is just wonderfully.... normal ^.^
I mean that in a good way! I'm impressed with your ability as a young writer; Only 15 and I think you show great promise!

My favorite poem of this genre is by A. Cowley:
It's very short but explains it concisely :)

"A mighty pain to love it is,

And 'tis a pain that pain to miss;

But of all pains, the greatest pain

It is to love, but love in vain."

Best of luck, Samantha...
Write as often as you can! ^^

        03-21-2008     Frank Fields        

This is a very complex work and needs to be read carefully and slowly and several times. If these things are done, some doors will open and some lights may shine on the deeper meanings that come to me, at any rate. ^^
It's interesting that you are writing as if this object of your love was right beside you. Until the end, when we have to decide to what it is that you are speaking. A dream? A wish? An on-line personality?
This reminds me somewhat of my own writing, if you will forgive my vanity. It is quiet, and gentle, and smooth, and tells a story, and is filled with emotional touches that brush against one's heart and mind. It also draws the reader into your web and won't let him go until you're done with the final word.
Masterful touches, all of these and more. If this writing is speaking to more than a very well presented idea, I hope that meeting will take place and the notice given. ^_~

Frank :)

        03-19-2008     Leigh Gilholm Fisher        

Reminds me of one of my favorite quotes ever:

Is it like this? Is it always the same? If you like this, would you remember my name?

It's a very sad sentiment, when you think of it. Wondering how a person thinks of you, whether they're more than a friend or not, is a common topic for a poem but my favorite is usually wondering if someone you know a little bit even acknowledges you. This is close to that, so I enjoyed this piece. :)

The flow and rhymes were admirable and kept things moving all the way into the end. It wasn't the largest of all poems but you conveyed your point and idea very clearly. Great work, keep it comin'!

And if that stupid phone starts blinking next time I open a page I'm unplugging it...


Leigh of the Commenting Community

        03-18-2008     Rikki Visser        

yes yes smurfette i have dragged myself here to comment on your poem just like you have asked.
sorry it took so long we all have been overloaded and slammed with school
this is truly magnificent i recall reading this in your journal a few weeks back and i remember you told me it was about that guy Richard you had a crush on but i think it explains us all at times


        03-16-2008     Eric Gasparich        

A good poetic explication of the ambivalence most young people feel about themselves, their worth, their place in life, their desirability to the opposite sex, etc. Self-consciousness is the subtext of nearly every line. Some things get clearer as you get older, but I wish I could tell you things get better, too. Yes. I do wish that. ;)





        03-16-2008     Richard Reed Jr        

There is a nice rhythm to this poem and some very good rhymes. It's a soft and gentle poem.
I was very entertained when I read your poem and I hope you keep up the good writes.

Thanks for sharing.

~Rich



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