Jonathan Swift Vs Rajasir
Age Rating: 7 +
Picture Credits: Personal
My students had already left the classroom but I could see someone sitting in the last row. Out of curiosity, I walked down the aisle and found myself face to face with Jonathan Swift, smiling in his peculiar satirical way, as if trying to find faults with my pedagogical abilities.
Rajasir: " Am I dreaming, Sir, you .......?"
Jonathan Swift: “I have a complaint that you have thrown my works and my friend Addison's works out of your college syllabus?"
Rajasir: " Nowadays, knowledge, wisdom and education are not superior, sir: institution,Dean, Head of the Department and syllabus makers are superior."
Jonathan Swift: "When a true genius appears in the world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him."
Rajasir: “Yes, Sir, we have already poisoned and executed Socrates, crucified Jesus and burnt Robert Bruno at the stake and many more have already been chased out of our societies."
Jonathan:"We have just enough religion to make us hate, but not enough to make us love one another."
Rajasir: “No, Sir, if you follow my religion, I love you very much. My religion is teeming with love. I hate others because their religions, I think, don't inculcate the feelings which mine does. By the way, what is religion, Sir?"
Jonathan Swift: "Laws are like cobwebs, which may catch small flies, but let wasps and hornets break through."
Rajasir: “I fully agree with you and we have maintained this venerable tradition because murderers, smugglers, gun-runners, the biggest liars, etc. are above the law, and parking rule breakers, speeding drivers, women selling bodies for food, petty thieves who may have stolen a loaf of bread, and the likes are very securely imprisoned, and not only that, they carry the tag along for their whole life."
Jonathan Swift: “Instead of dirt and poison we have rather chosen to fill our hives with honey and wax; thus furnishing mankind with the two noblest of things, which are sweetness and light."
Rajasir: “We have filled our hives with arms and ammunition; thus furnishing mankind with the two deadliest notions, which are: power to kill a large number of people and less time consumption in doing so."
Jonathan Swift: “There is nothing in this world constant, but inconstancy."
Rajasir: “No, Sir, killing instinct and the feeling of superiority are constant, two out of many perhaps unknown to you."
Jonathan Swift: “There are few, very few, that will own themselves in a mistake, though all the World sees them to be in downright nonsense."
Rajasir: “This is an art very unique to humans and very religiously bequeathed to posterity.”
Jonathan Swift: “And surely one of the best rules in conversation is, never to say a thing which any of the company can reasonably wish had been left unsaid…"
Rajasir: “This cunningness is very ceremoniously taught in our educational institutions.People often shower you with lies and praise you where they should have scorned. I wish we had more of those warriors who could speak frankly, not trying to please the listener."
Jonathan Swift: “We are so fond of one another, because our ailments are the same."
Rajasir: “Sir, what is fondness? All our actions are positive if we receive rewards and praise."
Jonathan: "…one enemy can do more hurt, than ten friends can do good."
Rajasir: “Nowadays friends and enemies are changed as shirts and numbers are not important in this wonderful world."
Jonathan Swift: “Proper words in proper places make the true definition of a style."
Rajasir: “The best available lies to disguise other lies make the true definition of a style. And, plagiarism, cunningly done is an added feather to a style."
Jonathan Swift: “Are you trying to write another book for your students?"
Rajasir: “Yes and this conversation is going to be a chapter of that book."
I turned my face to hide my cunning smile but when I turned back to look at him, he was nowhere to be seen.