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Saying goodbye to anyone you know you won't see again for a while can be sad. Saying goodbye to a special person for the last time is very sad.
And then saying goodbye to Grandpa was heartbreaking, when you knew he was trying to tell you goodbye forever.
When I was a child we were very close. I lived on a farm just down the road from grandpas farm. He was a farmer most of his life, and a good farmer.
I loved his saying about life. My favorite was during a thunderstorm when it, would thunder out loud” he'd say Gods dumping Irish potatoes for all the Irish men.” Grandpa of course had a heritage of Irish in him.
I use to muse at the thought of how much of an Irishman here really was indeed. He was short and had red hair, fair skinned and strong as an ox, that was grandpa. Years have come an gone. I'm grownup and I’m a grandmother myself. I let the year’s pass by with hardly any visits to my grandpa.
I received a call from my father;” he said that grandpa was not to good he had been in the hospital for a few days. He was diagnosed with colon cancer,
and the Doctor wasn't giving him much time he said this kind of cancer spreads fast, he had never seen it come with such vengeance as it had come upon my grandfather.” I returned back home to see him one more time.
My husband Mike drove all the way as I reminisced about my childhood with grandpa. I had a special name for him Bopo instead of grandpa. They tell me
I gave him that name. His real name is Robert; they called him Bob for short, a combination between Bob and grandpa. It caught on for most of the
grandchildren for it was so easy for them to say.
We arrived at the folks late in the evening. No one was at home so we made our way straight for the hospital. My father had told me what hospital and what floor grandpa was on. I hit the fourth floor button on the elevator. I wish it were more like pushing a number to stand in line and to wait anxiously for a package. Instead it was the realization of coming to grips with the fact that we all grow old and we all have our time each of us will leave this life. And Grandpa’s time had arrived and he knew it, and as with all things in his life he prepared for the finale day.
I entered his room my eyes searching the room seeking a glimpse of grandpa. In bed all frail, weak and mostly bone, I found a once strong Irishman he glanced over when my mother said” look who has come to see you dad.” For a moment I caught a glimpse of that special magical wink he always had when he'd see me glowed
in his eyes. He nodded and held his hand out to me.
It had been along trip for us and he was getting tired, I told him goodnight and that I would be back in the morning to see him. He smiled and
nodded okay still holding onto my hand. I gave him a kiss on his for head and turned away to leave.
Morning arrived with familiar sounds of days gone past. Grandma and Mom were visiting over
breakfast preparation. After breakfast and a quick shower. I returned back to the hospital with mother and grandmother.
We entered his room he was sitting up in his bed. He had just finished breakfast himself. The nurse said” he slept well the previous night and he had a small appetite this morning.” She left us with grandpa to visit. I told him we fed his birds at home and about how many and what kinds were there for the early morning ritual that he had been in charge of for years. Tending to the bird feeders and watching the birds flock to the feeders. He followed every word I spoke with interest about the birds.
Mom and Grandma were going to go down to the cafeteria for a beverage, I told them to go ahead I would stay with Grandpa. I rubbed his feet he said” they were sore. “He enjoyed the foot rub so much he said “he needed his face and arms rubbed with lotion they were also dry.” “ You know I feel like I have been trudging in a dry parch dusty desert.” I finished applying lotion and giving him water to quench his thirst. He laughed and said” that felt good and now that I had doctored him all up. He wanted me to know that he will be going out west when they let him go home to the homestead as he called it.
I knew what he was referring to. Grandpa use to say,” When he was going anywhere away from home that he was going out west.”
He also meant to it as going to ones resting place. Tears welled up in my eyes. I didn’t want this conversation, I wanted to change the ending of this story but I couldn’t he was the author and he was also the storyteller and it was after all his story. He asked if I knew the difference of he would be gone and was dying and that even though I will have a picture of him or a memory he would be forever gone. “Yes I answered with a choking feeble yes. “As tears slipped down my cheek and landed on his wrist. I looked up not knowing what to say he gave me that magical look between concern, laughing, smiling, and a wink all at once. And he said I was a good grandchild and I replied with you are a good Bopo the best.
His doctor was sending him home day after we were to leave for home. Grandpa was anxious to return home he wanted to see the birds again out in his yard feeding in the birdfeeders. I said my last goodbye took me forever just couldn’t nor wouldn’t let go of him. He smiled gave me a hug and a kiss and then as stern as when I was a child he said, “Say goodbye child.” I obeyed and I did say goodbye. I knew and he knew it was our last goodbye. We returned home three days later my father called again.” He said Grandpa had passed away during his sleep the night before.” I told him we would be there sometime later in the day.
As we drove back to my grandparents, a storm brewed up and it began to thunder and the sounds of barrels of Irish potatoes being sent down from God to all the Irishmen could be heard. I knew God had some help this time for Grandpa was rolling those barrels right beside him, A warm tear dripped upon my cheek and fell upon my wrist as I remembered my Bopo and all his sayings. Somehow that storm on the way home helped me to know that he was at peace. And I also knew he was in a safe place out west.
Bopo was buried September 11,2001 A day I will never forget as the family prepared for his burial the tv was on and it was announced to the world the
tragedy of the September 11Th. Victims. I wept for
all loses that day. With All of the world.;
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