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Picture Credits:
ELLEN, AVENGER OF MAIDENS or,
SEX: The Good, The Bad, and The Purple
By Nan Jacobs c/1999
[WARNING: sexually explicit language. Not for the faint of heart, weak of stomach, or humor-impaired]
Contrary to popular belief, we romance writers don't thrive on "purple prose". Allow me to whet your appetite with some words many of us find irksome:
Manroots.
Saucy breasts. Nubbins.
Laving tongues. Tongues are okay, mind you. We're just tired of =laving= tongues.
We know what works for us as readers and what doesn’t. If the characters are intriguing, the story wonderful, we'll pass off the occasional turgid staff and honey-sweet love juices as minor irritants.
But do we know what works--and doesn’t--in our own writing? Do we recognize our histrionic prose, worn-out clichés and silly gimmicks?
Take heed, all ye who aspire to write a love scene, lest ye fall into the fathomless pit of purple, as I did one dark and stormy night.
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Bob and I have agreed, for reasons that you shall find quite clear, that the "horribile dictu" portion of this rather bawdy article should not be included here at PnP. It can, however, for those who wish to further torture themselves, be found at this URL:
ELLEN, AVENGER OF MAIDENS (WARNING: graphic sexual details)
http://members.tripod.com/fictionfix/extra2.html
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Near as I can tell, most who read about Ellen's adventure--oops, love scene--fall off their chairs and spill their sodas--laughing.
Wouldn’t you prefer your love scene to leave readers sighing?
What constitutes a "good sex scene"? It’s not the body parts. Not who’s touching whom where and with what. Not clichés, nor laughable euphemisms.
IT’S EMOTION.
Sex is the natural extension of the hero and heroine’s love for each other.
Your love scene should move the story forward, not be tossed in for more heat. Something should be at stake which will affect the outcome of at least the scene, perhaps even the story. And that "something" must be inextricably bound to EMOTION. If the characters haven't consciously admitted their love, the =reader must believe= their emotions are involved.
Critique your love scene seeking elements of goal, motivation or conflict relating to the scene or story question. I think you'll discover that involvement of "GMC" in the love scene will pave the way for... you guessed it... EMOTION.
As a starting point, I offer this subjective list of eye-rollers, which can upstage your love scene quicker than a…um… quickie:
· =Manroots. Throbbing staffs. Velvet shafts. Velvet-on-steel. Turgid manhood. Pulsing members (of congress?). Hard evidence of his arousal (offensive to legal minds). Magnum-sized manroots (and I don’t mean Magnum, P.I.). The ten-second rejuvenation (a.k.a. a pocketful of miracles).
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· =Mounds of desire. Honeyed sweetness. Silken sheaths.
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· =Saucy breasts. Breasts that swell, all by themselves.
Nubbins. Orbs of desire.
· =Laving tongues. Tongues laving nubbins. Tongue plunging in mouth at same frantic pace as, er, velvet shaft in silken sheath.
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· =Arching backs. Raking nails.
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· =Hero-who-rapes-heroine-but-makes-her-love-it.
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· =Gratuitous sex. Sex because it’s chapter ten and it’s supposed to happen there. Sex every time they see a blade of grass. Sex anywhere and everywhere, heedless of scorpions and fire ants.
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· =Independent body parts (His hot eyes fell upon her escaping breasts) (Really. Picture it...).
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· =Elasto-man syndrome (physically amazing positions).
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· =Play-by-play action (insert Part A into Part B...).
Now purge those euphemisms, keep that purple tongue out of your cheek, and go write a compelling love scene!
Sure, you may practice first. :-)
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