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For The Sake Of The Children
By Carlotta Withers-Poon
All too often these days, in a world bereft of human kindness and civility, we turn a blind eye to those who could use a helping hand. Now, while it may be possible that I'm not a candidate for sainthood myself, I just can't just stand idly by when I see folks who need help. For example, if I see a couple on the street having an argument, I'll immediately step in and help them resolve their issues. That’s just who I am. More often than not, they’re so stunned by the caring shown by a total stranger, many times they completely forget why they were fighting in the first place. Most don’t even pay any outward attention to the 9-milimeter Beretta I keep in my shoulder holster.
While it is true that my humanitarian endeavors extend to all aspects of contemporary life, I consider child-rearing to be my specialty. Hardly a day passes that I don't come across a young mom who could use some of my sage advice.
It is human nature for most people, upon observing a woman screaming at her 3-year-old, to look away and mind their own business. ‘She shouldn’t do that, but this doesn't concern me,’ they rationalize. Well… I’m simply not like these people, I think. Aren’t we all connected? Instead of turning away, I'd approach this woman and offer, "Pardon me, Sweetie, but I couldn't help but notice you seem to be having some parenting difficulties. Perhaps you might consider buying him a toy or something to keep him occupied. This would not only keep him from annoying passersby with his incessant shrieking, but a play object would do wonders for his sub-standard motor-skills!"
Now, why, you might ask, would I go out of my way to help this woman when so many others would merely pretend it didn’t occur? Simple. Since I have the foresight to watch Oprah, I understand that it takes a village to raise a child.
Although I never actually had any kids of my own, I've been around the block enough times to know what to do, believe me. However, despite my obvious expertise, some mothers are inexplicably and surprisingly resistant to my helpful advice. Their stubborn attitude is unfortunate, as the child suffers from Mom’s lack of foresight. I know if I were a young mother who didn't have a clue about she was doing, I would welcome the insightful advice of a beautiful, knowledgeable stranger.
For example, take the mom I recently saw giving her child one of those drink boxes that contains sugar-water. Concerned that she mistakenly thought she was giving her little miracle a real fruit juice drink, I told her that it's largely artificial. Sadly, she felt threatened by my superior parenting skills and told me to "take a flying f**k at a rolling donut." Aghast though I may have been, I assured her that it was an understandable mistake. The box, after all, deceptively depicts an arrangement of apples, grapes and citrus. I lovingly told her not to feel embarrassed and gently advised her to read the labels more carefully in the future. "Drinks featuring the phrase 'fruit drink' or 'juice cocktail' are, in all likelihood, only 5 or 10 percent juice… at most!" I told her. "It’s in your child’s best interest that you avoid those."
Instead of showing a little gratitude for the advice, this woman showered me with invective and suggested I "get my own damn kids." Did my generous offer of aid really warrant this spate of hostility? (Bear in mind that I repeatedly assured her that this one little no-no did not necessarily make her a bad parent.) Things only got worse when I tried to point out that perhaps if she could learn to better manage her temper, her kids might benefit and grow up well-adjusted.
I suppose it might be strange, but once you understand that many (dare I say most) people could use a little common-sense advice in child-rearing, you start seeing it almost everywhere. Recently, I was power-walking through the neighborhood and observed a lady allowing her children to run around the yard in clothes that apparently hadn't been washed in over a week. So I politely explained to this woman that even if a parent doesn't have enough money for new clothes, it's still easy to maintain a neat appearance with regular clothes-washing. Plus, the investment in soap and water will help extend the life of their cute little hand-me-downs. Next thing you know, it's raining F-bombs.
It’s unfortunate, but even though she called the police to force me off her lawn, I’m willing to bet she’ll see to it that her children will be a little more presentable in the future. As long as that's the case, I'll take her verbal abuse, and I’m sure the judge will dismiss my case, especially if my gun permit has come through by the time I go to court. I shall not be deterred in my fight for the little ones…that’s just who I am.
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