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About 3 summers ago, my uncle had a van that's battery had one out several
months before. As a young child, my cousin, Jordan, twin sister, Allie, and
friend, Rachel had played in that van, and ate our tea in there from time to
time, it was just tradition by then.
At the time, a new girl band, B*Witched, had just come around a year before
and had released their second album, and my 'partners in crime' and I had
loved the group dearly. Of course, once Rachel had bought the new album, we
listened to it all weekend.
At that time, Allie was in her "I'm bad" phase and had left us to be around
some blokes she had met earlier, so then it was just Jordan, Rachel, and
myself. AH, how the three of us loved to play pretend games, and we got this
mad idea to pretend to be the people in B*Witched, it consisted of four
members, and since we were missing our fourth link, we decided something,
which you will find out soon enough. Oh yes, we had to have been utterly
crackers at the time indeed. I was Edele Lynch: The level headed, stubborn,
hotheaded, twin sister of Keavy Lynch, I was also lead singer. Jordan was
Sinead O'Carroll, the serious, sophisticated, yet loony character who had the
low harmony parts of most songs. Rachel was Lindsay Armaou, the bubbly,
lovable one who sang soprano. She was also one half-Greek, as Rachel.
Our plot: We had decided that it was time to run away after our "evil
parents" had threatened each of us, and all were different sets of parents.
Since Allie was not there, we had decided that the left over member, Keavy,
would have tattled on us, soon after we had left in the "Magic Van" a.k.a.,
the rotting pile of scrap metal lying in the drive. Why we decided this as
our plot, I have no exact idea. As we all ran to the Magic Van, which, mind
you, could transform into a submarine, aeroplane, car, jet, boat, anything of
that sort. Anywho, as the 3 of us made our way to the Magic Van, running from
the evil parents, we got in and supposedly traveled to the states. Oh yes,
those evil parents were on our tails, while the van was a jet, and if I
remember correctly, they were firing missiles at us.
We all took turns in the driving seat. We took stops every so often and met
people who'd tell us good hideouts. These people were actually made out of
air, so to the neighbours we must have appeared as people who needed to be
taken to the mad house. After awhile of stopping off every so often, we got
back into the Magic Van, I was in the farthest seat back, Jordan was on the
passenger's side, and Rachel was "driving". Right before we started off to
Hawaii, it occurred to Rachel, "What if we roll away?" Ah this was the start
of the "what if" curse, But I'll get to that later. Jordan and I assured her
that a ridiculous thing like that was not going to happen, and after about 2
minutes of convincing her, we were on our way to Hawaii.
About 30 seconds later I heard Rachel state "OH MY GOSH!!!" from the driving
seat, looked up out the window, and realized that we were actually rolling
away. I screamed "WE'RE ROLLING AWAY" in a high pitched voice and jumped out
the open door of the Magical Van. I landed face first in the nearby patches
of grass and dirt; nearly hitting my head on the old clubhouse we had
occupied years before. I am not quite sure of the dialog in the van after I
jumped out, but I was told of it later, and I am almost sure it went
something like this:
Jordan: *still occupied with the map* Hush now, we are NOT rolling away.
Rachel: JORDAN!
Jordan: What now? What is it? *Looks up from the map* Holy Mother! We ARE
rolling away! Oh no, me da's gonna kill us!
Rachel: Jordan...*shakes her head slowly and has the most horrible look of
terror ever on her face* I've got to get out of here.
Jordan: Rachel, where is Erin?!
Rachel: Oh her? She jumped out, *as if it happens everyday*
Rachel then jumped out of the van.
Jordan: RACHEL WHERE ARE YOU GOING?!
By then Rachel had jumped out and landed face first on the grass in the drive.
Jordan: oh dear, I'm going to die.
Rachel was screaming "JORDAN!" over and over from the top of her lungs at
this point, watching the van as it still rolled. Jordan then jumped out
herself, with the map stuck to her. I remember seeing Jordan run like the
world was over from the corner of my eye while I watched the van continue to
roll and crash into the neighbour's new fence.
I will never forget that sound of the crackling wood. Jordan screamed at me
"ERIN RUN!" so I did. Rachel too. We had run around to the front of the
house, Jordan had climbed a nearby tree, and was out of sight by then. Rachel
and I, alarmed, were both talking very fast and scared-like to Jordan's mum.
Her mum had gathered that some man in a van had taken Jordan, since she was
nowhere to be seen, Rachel and I quickly explained that this was not the
case, and brought Jordan's mum to the back of the house where the van had
hit. Jordan had come out of the tree in seeing her mother wasn't upset, just
highly scared for each of us. She promised not to tell Rachel's mum or dad
because they were very harsh in punishment on her.
However, when Jordan's father had returned later that evening, he was
severely angry yelled at us and immediately called Rachel's parents, and
failed to call mine, they were miles away, in Dublin while we were in
Kildare. It cost well over what was in our pocketbooks to repair the fence,
however it was completed nearly 6 months later. To this day, my parents have
no clue about the rollaway van, and I don't intend to tell them of it anytime
soon.
The "What if…" curse lives on, and what happens is, every time Rachel says
"What if…" then something follows that statement, it ALWAYS happens, and I
have plenty more stories of us girls, which are fairly humourus. Warning:
There are tons more, this we think is still the funniest, but perhaps you had
to have been there? In saying we have all been best friends since we were of
the age of three, I will continue to tell loads of wild stories, so stay
tuned! This story has actually happened and is not fictional
-Erin H--,-@
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