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Attempted Suicide

by Jeniffer Brand (Age: 43)
copyright 09-22-2002


Age Rating: 13 +

I know what I'm talking about because I've been there.
And I know what it feels like because I've felt it.
You feel empty, depressed, you shut down and then really don't care.
You think there's no other way out, like you're trapped in a deep dark pit!

So life has no meaning, no worthiness anymore.
You feel all alone in this world filled with hurt and pain.
No one knows, you appear ok, acting as if your soul isn't one big sore.
You don't let them see that you feel ill, crazy, like you're going insane.

Now you make up your mind, your going to end all this tonight!
You look around, gather your things, and put everything in their places.
You don't think about "who" will find you, you don't worry about "their" fright!
After all, you won't know, you're dead, you can't see their faces!

You wake up, in the hospital, your stomach was pumped.
You feel terrible, angry, that your not dead!
Around you, your family, your friends,everyone all stumped.
Asking themselves "what is it I've done, what is it I've said"?

My angels were with me that night, I know for a fact!
I see things I took for granted, like the people I love and who care.
I was lucky to put all that behind me with everything in tacked!
For "Harm None" it is written, and that I wouldn't again dare!

Life still tries me with hurt and distruction.
But I've learned my lesson and refuse to get down.
I've found my peace, my intuition, my instruction.
Now I walk with a smile, for my heart and soul no longer have a frown.






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        04-13-2005     Mary -BrytEyz- Ball        

distruction... should that be spelled destruction?

I once tried it...but thought about my family and friends and how much pain I would cause them so I caused myself to throw all the pills up. I was sicker than a dog for over a week...but I've never tried it again since. I owe too much to those around me than to stain their lives in that way and permanently tarnish the image I've worked so hard to polish over the years. :-) I'm glad you are part of PnP, and though I don't read as often as I'd like... I do cherish the chances I'm given. Thank you for giving us something wonderful to read.

        03-08-2005     Anthony Lane Stahlhut        

I wrote a poem a few days ago called "Being Different" and I would love to know what you think about it. This is a sad poem, yet I am happy that in the end your attempt was derailed. Thank God for you! Thanks, Anthony

        11-06-2004     SamiJo Mcquiston        

I know how you feel.
I too have benn down that road.
But I learned to deal with it by writeing.
That was amazeing, keep up the good work.

        07-26-2004     Sam Hackel-Butt        

Yes, life is precious. My fave lines were
"I've found my peace, my intuition, my instruction.
Now I walk with a smile, for my heart and soul no longer have a frown. "

Keep writing!

-Sammy :)

        05-11-2003     Gregory Christiano        

Important message for many people to heed. Life is precious. Stay alive. Even in the darkest moments, life is still worth living.

        09-24-2002     Dixie Kincaid        

I can really relate to that poem very well. I.ve been there myself Jennifer an the despare a person can feel wretches the heart right out of you. I'm glad I've been able to rise above that part of my life that made me feel so worthles. Glad to see you have been able to also. DIXIE LEE



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