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Gabriela Tridente
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Foreshadowed Doom
by Shannon Jaime (Age: 19)
copyright 10-05-2002
Contest Winner

Age Rating: 13 to 127

 
Oh, cruel fate of world...
The day has come,
And with the sign of the blinding light,
I will be the next to be devoured by the abyss,
To fade into oblivion.

Was it destiny that foretold?
My thoughts intrude
As I plummet unknowingly,
And succumb to the nightmares,
Surrendering to the darkness.

Falling endlessly into ambiguity;
Descending rapidly,
My wings of sanctuary melt away.
Frayed feathers drift with the wind of uncertainty,
Hesitant to abandon the skies.

How long have I been lost?
Searching for the path,
I run into the distance,
Yet I can never seem to reach the gate—
Cast away to foreshadowed doom.

Consumed by fear of impending release;
Swimming against currents of anxiety,
I try to break surface;
Overwhelmed by panic, it is no use:
All hope has drowned.

Will the tears someday cease?
Locked in prisons of despair,
Chained beside an awaiting agony;
Every moment belongs to broken promises.
Forever is only an eternity...


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Comments on this Article/Poem:
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11-04-2007 Leigh G.    

Your stuff really reaches the depth of theme songs for Final Fantasies....Kiss Me Goodbye by Aki Angela excluded, but anyway! And that is a good thing; the thing I like about your work is it relates to less common topics of writing. Out of the 1500+ comments I have made, a large sum of them are probably on love poems. To read your pieces that are about such deeper topics is highly refreshing.

The ideas you have and your choice of words are epic, by the third paragraph I was completely glued to the screen thinking, "it's a five starer." Good work titling the poem fittingly, too. Great work! I loved it!


Leigh of the Commenting Community


P.S. I don't mean to sound like I'm gloating with the 1500+ comments; I only bring it up to emphasize reasons I enjoy original poems. ^-^
11-08-2002 Christopher Underwood    

i also am a dark poet, every word is but a wrtten tear
11-02-2002 Heather Lynn McDanel    

Three Words:
WOW YOU'RE GOOD!
11-01-2002 Shannon Jaime    

I greatly appreciate all of your comments! Thank you everyone! ^^

*SJ*
11-01-2002 Nan Jacobs    

COngratulations Shannon!

Ditto what Billy said...

~~nan
11-01-2002 Aaron Schmookler    

Congrats! A fine poem, and an illustration of a very fine vocabulary as well.
10-07-2002 William Robbins    

A wonderfully express verse, fill with all the energy to keep the reader's attention.
Visitor Reads: 439
Total Reads: 726
Comments: 7

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