Have you ever wondered why the kids in your neighborhood hang out at one particular house on the block? No matter what time of the day or season: From 12:00 midday summer to 12:00 midnight winter, it's always that one particular house.

Don't you wish you knew the secret? The great attraction? No, the lady of the house isn't Glenda, the good witch of the North. It takes more than the waving of a magic wand to produce this phenomenon. It also takes more than buckets full of pre-sweetened Kool-aid. What it takes is good common sense and a bit of ingenuity. It won't happen overnight. You'll have to work at it. But if you're sincere and you practice these 5 rules faithfully, I guarantee you'll be the best mommie on your block. Moreover, I guarantee you'll go bananas!

1) Kids operate best in the early morning hours. Wake them up at 6:00 A.M. Gave them whatever they ask for breakfast...Candy, chocolate chip cookies, ice cream, pizza. Don't deny them them this pleasure. Anything their little hearts desire.

2) Don't want to go to school? Hey, have a fun day instead. Invite their little friends over. The more, the merrier. Have any pets? Bring them in with the kids. After all, kids and pets get along famously. They were made for each other. When shopping for a dog, get the biggest one you can find; preferrably a doberman pincher. Small kids and big dogs make such a cute picture! By all means get a cat, too, and a canary or parrot to keep it company.

3) All 17 of them helped you prepare lunch and now they want to take a bath? Terrific! What's more natural than kids and water? Give them the bubble bath. The whole 20 0z bottle. How about fingerpaints, so they can paint pictures on your bathroom walls? If you have some big, plastic toys and other noisey toys to go around, that would be super. If you don't have enough, throw in the dog. Remember to close the door to ensure privacy.

(p.s.: If you don't have bubble bath, your husband's shaving cream would do just fine.)

4) Don't put off your grocery shopping because of the kids. Take them along with you. Encourage them to give you directions to the supermarket and tips on how to drive. Let them assume some responsibility. Give them the shopping cart to ride each other around in the store. Let them browse at will in the toy section. Allow them to test some of the toys and sample fruits and cookies off the shelves. When the manager becomes enraged, remind him that he was once a kid, too.

5) Nighttime already? Where did the time go? If the little dears don't mention staying overnight, insist they do. Call up their mommies and inform them that the kids will be spending the night over. Then proceed to throw a slumber party. Have lots of snacks ready, lots of jammies, and lots of pillows so they can pillow fight till the wee hours of the morning. If your child's room is too small for all of them, you may want to relinquish your big bedroom with your king-sized bed so they can rough it out. Your husband will thank you for the opportunity to sleep in his son's twin bed. Be prepared to be awakened during the night for at least 10 potty trips and 12 trips to the kitchen for water.

When you finally turn in at 3:00 A.M. you'll be glad you suggested they spend the night over so you don't have to call them up on the phone. You'll want them there bright and early at 6:00 A.M. to begin your day by practicing these 5 rules.

Remember practice makes perfect; and perfect is what you'll have to be in order to succeed as the best mommie on your block!