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Robert Betts
Eric Gasparich
2 Writers

Hollie Rosien
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3 Members
30 Guests

Falling Leaves
by Mary -BrytEyz- Ball (Age: 38)
copyright 08-02-2001


Age Rating: 4 to 127

 
We never get more than we give
Not the other way around
So wilting dreams will wither
And float softly to the ground
A crying tree you'll not forget
As it weeps without a sound
When leaves are gone, the tree is bare
Dried out dreams lay in a mound

~~@~~ ~~@~~ ~~@~~ ~~@~~ ~~@~~ ~~@~~

I've been working on this some more. I should know better than to post things right as I write them. Ugh!

~~@~~ ~~@~~ ~~@~~ ~~@~~ ~~@~~ ~~@~~

We never get more than all that we give
It never happens the other way 'round
I see wilting dreams as they wither up
And then float softly to the ground

You'll never forget a crying trees sight
It silently weeps, shedding without a sound
When the leaves are gone, and the tree is bare
Those dried out dreams lay all in mounds

If you've the chance then perhaps you'll see
the treasured beauty in trees all around
And you'll count yourself lucky on that day
Just never let go of the leaves you've found

~~@~~ ~~@~~ ~~@~~ ~~@~~ ~~@~~ ~~@~~

And I'll keep working at it! Your suggestions will help me a great deal. *hint, hint*... *giggle*




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Comments on this Article/Poem:
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04-26-2006 Leigh G.    

Wow, that's really going to stick with me...Such a great comparison, A crying tree you'll not forget, as it weeks without a sound... This was a great piece! I suggest you remove that little notation, even though the larger proration of my poems that I've submitted were written on the spot! This was really great work, with some really meaningful comparisons and metaphors. I don't know what's more amazing. The poem, or the fact that nobody as commented it. I can't fins any grammar or spelling flaws, and this was a great poem! Keep writing!

Leigh of the Commenting Crusaders


04-01-2001 Mary -BrytEyz- Ball    

I too agree with you and disagree with me. I'm just in a bitter moment right now. I changed it a bit, is that any better? *smile* Thanks for all your sweet comments and constant encouragement.




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