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Harmony Like Starlight
by Ajda G. (Age: 16)
copyright 12-02-2003


Age Rating: 10 to 127

 
Harmony
Like starlight
Pure
True
Bright

Harmony
Like sunlight
Cleansing
Guiding
By might

Harmony
is locked away
Like night is
Locked away by day

Harmony
Like soul light
Innocent
Flourishing
And with wings of flight




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Comments on this Article/Poem:
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11-29-2004 SamiJo Mcquiston    

Andrea is right, this has such imagination.
The wording is beautiful.
The third stanza is a little bulky though, I would suggest trimming it down a bit.
Keep up the good work.
08-30-2004 Andrea Jeanette DiGiantomasso    

Such imagery!!! It's lovely, that's the only word I can think of to adequetly describe this piece. I agree with Deborah--nix the punctuation, that'd break the flow. However I do have something else I'd like to comment on~ The first part, "Pure/True/And Bright/Harmony", really breaks the flow itself, you know? The "And" detracts to me, kind of slaps me out of the dreamy state you put me in (it acts as punctuation in poetry, that's what I've discovered). So maybe if you made it "Pure/True/Bright/STANZA/Harmony" that would keep the reader in the trance you create. Everything else about the poem is wonderful, perfect, your choice of words is flawless! So four praise points to you, fair maiden!
12-14-2003 Emily Garwood    

really nice poem
12-03-2003 Christopher Doss    

Very nice =)
Visitor Reads: 468
Total Reads: 507
Comments: 4

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