By miraclewriter (Age: 25)
Copyright 02-02-2012

Hell found me, Raylen thought as she was franticly running through the halls barefoot and then out the door into the rain. Looking for her best friend, screaming and crying, she wanted a shoulder to cry on, someone to understand her pain, Raylen knew she could find it in Malia. Malia was in a brisk walk towards Raylen not really knowing what’s going on. Raylen cried out ‘”Bap is gone, he was shot and killed last night.” Malia held her close and began to cry too.

Raylen and Bap were not dating when he was killed. She was at school in West Virginia and he was back in Lynchburg, Virginia, his hometown. They agreed to live separate lives until he came back to school. One of the last things he told her was “only time will tell.”Raylen had found someone else for the time being; his name was Isaiah. Isaiah and Raylen had been dating only a month when Bap was killed. Raylen never mentioned Bap before that fatal day. Isaiah didn’t understand why she was so upset; he was kind of mad when he found out the truth. Raylen always knew that she and Bap were supposed to be together forever. Time only came to show her that forever didn’t last long.

Problems began to arise between Raylen and Isaiah; he felt he was in competition with a skeleton, someone who was dead. He didn’t know how to talk to Raylen anymore, she found herself apologizing more and more for things that didn’t need an apology. Isaiah told her it was okay but she knew deep down it was killing him. Raylen loved Bap with all of her heart, but she loved Isaiah as well. She knew if she had a chance to choose her choice would always be Bap.

Although it took many months, Raylen was finally able to go days without crying. She began to dress up and even smile again. Isaiah stayed by her side through this terrible tragedy; he loved her so much. Bap’s death brought the two closer together with a lot of time and struggle .School was coming to an end. Isaiah lived in Washington D.C and Raylen lived in West Virginia; 6 hours apart. She wasn’t worried about the long distance, she knew she could be faithful and she believed he could too.

They talked on the phone every day. Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months. At one point Raylen felt the need to question Isaiah about another girl; he said they were just friends, so she left it at that. Days later while talking on the phone, Raylen asked Isaiah if she could come to see him, and he said no. That hurt her and raised more questions; she thought Isaiah was hiding something, she thought he was embarrassed of her. They argued that night for hours: he said he wasn’t ready for to come to his hometown yet, which hurt her more. That night was the first time she cried herself to sleep, but it wouldn’t be the last. Raylen began to feel like she was in love all alone; their conversations became shorter and they eventually came to a stop. Raylen tried to call him, she texted Isaiah every morning, “Good morning, I hope you have a good day. I love you.” She’d text him in the after-noon, “Hey babe, I hope you have a good day” and once more before she went to bed “Good night, sweet dreams baby. I love you.” No response.

Raylen constantly told herself that Isaiah just needed space. She cried herself to sleep many nights; some nights she wouldn’t sleep at all. When Raylen did sleep she dreamt about him, would wake up and cry; he was always on her mind. Deep down somewhere in her lost soul she knew it was over. She had true love before and Isaiah didn’t love her like Bap did; Bap never made her cry. She knew it was over because Isaiah had made her cry not once or twice but a lot of times. She didn’t want to let go; she loved Isaiah very much and didn’t want to lose someone else that she loved, clearly in denial. Raylen felt so alone with no one to understand, no shoulder to cry on. She knew hell found her again. Isaiah left her, with a broken heart that was never to be fixed again.

The next day, Raylen’s parents Sandy and Paul got a phone call from Malia, she was worried because she hadn’t talked to Raylen all day. Her parents went to check on Raylen, they walked into her room to find that Raylen wasn’t home, but before they walked out they found a note that read “Hell found me” with an arrow pointing to the right. Confused, her parents stared at the note, looked at each other then looked to the right to see Raylens’ closet door cracked open. Her mom opened it slowly and cautiously, curious to find out what was behind the door. Before any words came out of her mouth, her eyes saw Raylen’s lifeless body hanging there from a long sleeve shirt that said “love kills” and a belt; kind of ironic huh? Everyone knows where you go when you commit suicide…HELL!
Sad to say, Raylen’s parents knew it wouldn’t be long, before she did something like this. Her mother always told her dad she saw death in her eyes; since that night she’s had crazy in them beautiful brown eyes. Her dad was in denial; he thought it would go away and she’d be back to normal, so he didn’t pay his wife any mind. The day finally came for the viewing, a closed casket; the morticians couldn’t fix or cover the marks around her neck. Raylen’s parents thought it would be too much for her friends and family to see the physical representation of the damage that was done. About 200 people came to show their respects, left her favorite flowers and candy. Isaiah was the last to show up because he felt it was his fault. He wasn’t sure if he should even come; he didn’t know how to tell her goodbye when he just wanted to break up with her and now he really doesn’t know how to say goodbye for good.
“I didn’t want it to end like this,” he told Malia, but she didn’t want to hear it. All she knew was Isaiah broke her best friend’s heart when he promised to never leave. He left and now her best friend is dead. Malia could have killed him right then and there; she had a 9 millimeter in a grey clutch that Raylen got her for her birthday. She knew that Raylen would have rolled over in her grave and haunted her for the rest of her life if she would have killed Isaiah, because she really loved him: loved him enough to take her own life because it was over. Raylen didn’t want to have to go through life anymore waiting for another heartbreak, so she broke everyone else’s heart. Malia knew what Raylen was thinking; she hoped for a call or text from Isaiah to save the day, but it never came. Sandy and Paul talked to Isaiah while he was standing at the casket, telling him, “It’s not your fault.” Isaiah broke down and cried in Paul’s arms; the three cried so long they were the last ones to leave.

The next day was the burial service; just a few close friends and family members attended. Raylen wanted to be buried beside of Bap, so her parents granted her wish. They drove to Lynchburg and buried her beside her first love. Raylen and Bap lay dirt to dirt six feet under together in the end; just like they planned. He is in heaven and she is in hell, because hell found her once again.

 

Comments on this Article/Poem:
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        08-16-2012     Adam David Mckim

This is a sad story and I agree that suicide is a one way ticket to hell. It’s good that you point that out in this story. Although it’s a sad story, I enjoyed very much reading this.